Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband received the "antique" samurai sword that he bought on Craigslist with $399.99 of our money. He only shared my outrage at the waste of money when he opened the package, only to find a toy sword along with a note saying, "HAHA, TROLLED." FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, I was simply trying to fix my skateboard wheels with my pocket knife. The tip suddenly broke off, leaving me horrified. It was my favorite knife, which I inherited from my dad who abandoned me when I was 4. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. He pointed to two crossed swords above the fireplace and informed me the right one is his, and that if I ever hurt his daughter, he’ll give me a fighting chance by letting me use the left one. This guy thinks he lives in the Middle Ages or something. FML
Today, as part of his crusade to drive me mad by “helping” in the kitchen, my dad used an entire bottle of expensive olive oil I brought from Greece to make fried bread for his breakfast, and he used the edge of my Japanese chef's knife to loosen a screw, so it now has a giant hairline crack. FML
Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML
Today, my dad bought a one hundred dollar collectible light-saber. He plays with it. In the front yard. With sound effects. FML
Today, my dad rejected my birthday present to him because it was "Made in China." FML
Today, while showing off the sharpness of my new katana, I missed my target and hit my shoe. The strike cut into the second toe of my right foot, which then had to be amputated. Demonstration successful. FML
Today, I have quite a niche career forging swords, knives, and other weapons for museums. Well today my wife wanted to watch the anime Demon Slayer, we got to the scenes with the insane masked swordsmith, and she burst out laughing like, “Oh my god, you’re twins, grumpy twins!” FML
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Top comments
ezrocks4u 29
Maybe you should swing the cousin at a tree and see if he breaks..? Seriously though, make him repay you, and then some.
Kurby14 21
sounds like your cousin needs a sword to the face. sorry OP :( at least your dad loved his gift
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Comments (124)
FieldLeftBlank 20
Am I the only one wondering how come it was so easy to snap a (presumably) steel sword in two?
Ownord_fml 10
Contrary to popular belief, katana blades are quite fragile. They're not meant to cut down trees ^^ Little example: http://lastgif.com/gifs/2165.gif
PricelessHydra 5
honetly you got ripped off if you bought it from a real blacksmith. It was probably a fake and all they did was engrave the name.
reeper147 14
You don't know much about swords, do you? While the cutting edge of a katana is pretty good, it is an overall fragile blade. It has virtually no flex and shatters when it has a big impact, ie with a tree. Ever wonder why axes are so thick? It's so they don't break
esca6angel 16
I would modified and angry
jocamo 24
you might want to try that again
tigerzroze 16
I would ask for him to pay for the sword he broke, and have another one made. Then make sure when you give the new one to your dad, you cousin is no where near you.
Elban 20
Cousin should be taking his own life with the busted sword for the dishonor
S_Gnu 17
Did he kill bill
dkcrane 20
He has dishonore your famiry!!!
deathshead 19
racist, cliche, stupid.... ...should I keep going? chime in to if you got more to add...
Migole 36
Maybe his insurance will pay for it if you word it right, but otherwise I would absolutely make him pay for it. And depending how much it cost you, even take him to court for it because willful damage to property is something you can definitely sue for.
leogachi 15
@37 What kind of insurance would pay for that?
Migole 36
In Germany there's an insurance called "Haftpflicht Versicherung" (google translates it to "third party liability insurance") which pays, if for example you get dizzy and stumble in your friends tv. So if they word it like "he was trying the sword out and got dizzy/stumbled against the tree in an awkward angle which broke the fragile sword" they might pay for it.
CrazyV 22
I want to custom order a katana! Contact details, please?
yerawizardlizzy 27
As much as that really, really sucks, it's a good thing he didn't hurt anyone.