Today, it was my dad's retirement. He is traditional Japanese, so I had custom-ordered a samurai sword from a traditional Japanese blacksmith with dad's name engraved on the blade in kanji script. He loved it, right up til my drunk cousin tried to use it to cut down a tree and snapped it in two. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my husband received the "antique" samurai sword that he bought on Craigslist with $399.99 of our money. He only shared my outrage at the waste of money when he opened the package, only to find a toy sword along with a note saying, "HAHA, TROLLED." FML
Today, my dad met my boyfriend for the first time. He soon "casually" took a huge knife from the kitchen drawer and told my boyfriend that he's always wondered what it'd be like to stab someone. FML
Today, I was simply trying to fix my skateboard wheels with my pocket knife. The tip suddenly broke off, leaving me horrified. It was my favorite knife, which I inherited from my dad who abandoned me when I was 4. FML
Today, I met my girlfriend's dad. He pointed to two crossed swords above the fireplace and informed me the right one is his, and that if I ever hurt his daughter, he’ll give me a fighting chance by letting me use the left one. This guy thinks he lives in the Middle Ages or something. FML
Today, as part of his crusade to drive me mad by “helping” in the kitchen, my dad used an entire bottle of expensive olive oil I brought from Greece to make fried bread for his breakfast, and he used the edge of my Japanese chef's knife to loosen a screw, so it now has a giant hairline crack. FML
Today, my girlfriend’s dad has a sword he inherited from his dad that he claims links their family to the old Swiss nobility. I work in a museum so I know most of the makers' marks on swords, so I’m not sure how to tell him his sword is a reproduction made in Spain less than 100 years ago. FML
Today, my dad bought a one hundred dollar collectible light-saber. He plays with it. In the front yard. With sound effects. FML
Today, my dad rejected my birthday present to him because it was "Made in China." FML
Today, while showing off the sharpness of my new katana, I missed my target and hit my shoe. The strike cut into the second toe of my right foot, which then had to be amputated. Demonstration successful. FML
Today, I have quite a niche career forging swords, knives, and other weapons for museums. Well today my wife wanted to watch the anime Demon Slayer, we got to the scenes with the insane masked swordsmith, and she burst out laughing like, “Oh my god, you’re twins, grumpy twins!” FML
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Top comments
ezrocks4u 29
Maybe you should swing the cousin at a tree and see if he breaks..? Seriously though, make him repay you, and then some.
Kurby14 21
sounds like your cousin needs a sword to the face. sorry OP :( at least your dad loved his gift
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Comments (124)
awkwardmess 26
A katana can't break that easily. I'm sorry to say this, but I think you might have been ripped off
Vanderdale 14
Actually it can. In comparison to other swords, katanas, especially katanas made traditionally with folded steel, are fairly fragile. If used correctly they will last, but used incorrectly (such as by a drunken idiot trying to chop down a tree) they can definitely shatter. Katanas are meant to be used to make precise cuts to vital organs, not crudely hacked like a machete.
jocamo 24
I loved the Highlander movies/series, but that was one of the things they got wrong. Neither of the MacLeods would have survived a battle against someone with a broadsword, their katana would shatter from the force.
Ruskiy_Cherep 18
Mustve not been that great of a blacksmith. Or your cousin picked a tree too big. Either way a well smithed sword shouldnt break easily
soulreaper12296 28
Katanas are actually fragile. They're meant for more precise strikes (like hitting and oragan). Not being swung (probably full force) into most likely into a thick tree by and by a drunken idiot.
thatonetribute 31
I hope you shanked your drunk cousin.
ourtneyc 14
I would sue him, that is just not right and there is no excuse for his stupidity
Emirac 10
You would sue? You would SUE your own family for a dumb drunken mistake? What a petty human being you are. I'd most definitely make the cousin replace it, even if it's a younger cousin that had to mow my lawn for years to cover expenses because he's still in college. But sue him? Really.
soulreaper12296 28
#57, I think depending on how OP's cousin responds to being asked to pay for it being repaired/replaced, suing for damages is probably a good idea. Since OP had it made traditionally, personally inscribed, and made by a professional blacksmith it's safe to assume the Katana cost upwards of at least $1,000; most likely more.
ourtneyc 14
yeah that's what I meant, if he feels like he isn't responsible and won't pay then it's best to sue
DA3Z 16
Hopefully it didn't break immediately the first time it was swung, Japanese blades are known to slice through 6" of solid bamboo in a single swing and be pretty durable. Sorry OP, best gift ever though!
Elban 20
Bamboo hollow. Trees not so much. Contain more tree. Factor in going against the grain of a solid trunk. Physics wins every time damn it
soulreaper12296 28
You must not know the difference between bamboo and a tree.
writerchic85 26
He has brought shame upon your family. The only honorable thing to do now is have him kill himself with the very sword he broke.
CSXIV 19
Give you cousin this ultimatum: 1. You have disgraced the family. You must commit Seppuku! or 2. You have made me angry. You're paying for the replacement sword.
SailorSolaris 43
To my knowledge, it is possible to have it repaired. Maybe the blacksmith can fix it?
HighasaCloud 46
Why does this have downvotes? Forge-welding exists, people.
imabat 14
it shouldn't have broken if it was properly made. But any way it really sucks that's what happened
GhostFox 34
Katana are not made for hitting solid wood- bamboo can be sliced because it is hollow, but using even a good quality katana on bamboo would damage the blade over time, even if the sword was being used with the correct motions. The cousin is the one at fault here, not the blacksmith.
StarkWolf_fml 23
is it possible for traditional samurai sword to break that easily? or you just had a cheap blacksmith?
soulreaper12296 28
Katana's aren't meant for heavy blows (especially against a tree). They are meant more for along the lines of slashing and piercing organs.