Today, my phone kept beeping, so I put it on silent and went back to sleep. When I woke up later, I found the guy I went on a date with last night had sent dozens of messages. The first was "Good morning! :)" and the last was "Answer me u fuckin cunt!!!!" I think I'm staying single. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up, thinking it was going to be a good day. However, when I looked at my phone, I saw that my girlfriend had sent me an obscene number of angry messages, which are still coming in, because I forgot to say goodnight to her last night. FML
Today, I chatted to a nice guy and gave him my number. I told him I was going to sleep because I had a headache, and then put my phone on silent. He rang multiple times, and when I obviously didn't pick up, he sent several texts insulting me and calling me gutless for not responding. FML
Today, I woke up at 4:30am because I forgot to turn my Blackberry off 'loud'. I woke up to find an email from my ex-boyfriend's crazy mother who had sent me pictures of her son's wedding that had happened over the weekend. I am still single. FML
Today, at 3am, my boyfriend's phone notifications kept going off. I attempted to wake him up, but he didn't budge. When I went to silence it, I saw his Ashley Madison notification, followed by Tinder, Zoosk, and Plenty of Fish. We've been monogamous over a year... or so I thought. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML
Today, I went on a date with this guy and he was on his phone the whole night. When I got home I checked his Facebook since he barely paid attention to me. His status was, "So-and-so is taking out the trash" from mobile posted an hour ago. I got home from my date 30 mins ago. FML
Today, I was woken up by an overly sappy good morning text from my boyfriend, complete with kissy-face images. Before I could text him back, he sent a follow-up. "Oops. Wrong person." Wait, what? FML
Today, my boyfriend of 3 years told me he had a surprise for me at midnight. I stayed up all night, not hearing from him. Finally I get a notification. Apparently, my midnight surprise is that I'm single. FML
Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML
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Top comments
Cads1 24
Wow, crazy much?
MattStro 23
Somebodies a little impatient.
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Comments (99)
yeaforreal 14
Yea... On the bright side you know he's psycho and to stay away!
Brandi_Faith 34
Ya, as frustrating as it is, at least you found his true colours now before you've been dating for awhile. It would've sucked to have really liked him and not found this out until a month or so into the relationship. You need to text him saying that things didn't work out and you would appreciate if he wouldn't try and contact you again, then block his number. But be gentle about it, cause it sounds like you don't want to make him mad and make him more angry/obsessive. Keep an eye out for him op just to be safe.
Unbearable_fml 21
I hope there isn't going to be a second date.
Kurby14 21
I think you better run :/
nataliewby 25
Did he by any chance have severe eczema?
MattStro 23
Do you know what eczema is..?
tdawg91 17
Yeah that itchy skin can drive people crazy!! But on a more serious note, you may be thinking of schizophrenia
Anony2014 10
Dear Matt (#25), Natalie (#15) was referencing another FML from today where a guy had an eczema flare up on a first date with a girl he's liked for 4 years.
MattStro 23
Ah okay, that clears thinks up a whole bunch #32! Appreciate that!
jomar_19 17
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
YDI, for not checking your phone when it beeps. you could have at least glanced at it. whats the point of having a phone if you dont check it
Tyguy823 14
You sound dumb asf
jomar_19 17
lol its my opinion, so deal mf
MandieL 27
She was trying to sleep. She has every right to ignore her phone. If it was an emergency, he would have phoned until she answered, not just impatiently text.
SheepShoop_fml 20
Yeah! How dare people get the rest they need! OP should have clearly put aside their own needs to spend energy on this incredibly stable dude! In all seriousness, your opinion is absurd.
leogachi 15
I don't know about you, but I have a phone so that I can contact other people when I want to. The fact that other people can contact me is a bonus. Also, what if she had been busy do something else (like working, for example). He would have reacted the same way. Would it have been okay then?
piinksock 17
You're under no obligation to check or answer your phone ever if you don't want to. Constantly texting someone is the equivalent of barging into someone's life and following them round screaming "talk to me!" until they answer you. You wouldn't accept that in reality, so why is it ok over the phone?
SookyLala 13
@16 if you think this is ok, you shouldnt be with anyone. period.
SamySosa 10
I've had this happen to me before and i was actually busy at the time where i couldn't check my phone, i was actually relived they showed there true colors faster than usual and saved me the trouble lol
Silk_Routes 14
Errata! the mode of your phine revealed your inner choices...FYL op
MRSwick2525 23
Huh ↑???
mattzawesome 28
Run quick run far
mattzawesome 28
Didn't see the other one. Ready for the downvotes
rockwrench 18
Watch your back. He's got stalker written all over him.
Dodge4x4Ram 46
some of us jump into conclusions worse than others.
sstahpp 33
Lol to..not into.
Zgamerz 11
Was there a bad pun about your pussy in there too OP? Coming from an dumba** like that I wouldn't be surprised. How old is he, 5?