Today, my mother-in-law invited herself to my house to cook lunch. I'm postpartum, depressed, and nursing a two-week old. She fed me four small shrimp and a handful of macaroni. This is what I'll be eating for a month. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, as I'm pregnant, my mom came over to do some nice things for me, such as clean my kitchen and cook a large pot of my favorite soup. When she left, I took a nap, planning to eat later. I woke up to find my roommates had trashed my kitchen and eaten all my soup. FML
Today, my grandmother helped out by cooking a dish for me. It was so sweet of her, until I ended up having diarrhoea because of it. Now I'm worried to breastfeed my newborn with her food in my system. FML
Today, my mother-in-law tried to prove I was lying about my seafood allergy by adding minced prawns to the tomato sauce. In the last 24 hours, I have vomited and shit so much, plus the lost water weight from the sweating, I’ve lost almost 9lbs in body weight. FML
Today, I asked my mom if she could include mashed potatoes and gravy with dinner. She then went on to yell at me about my "unhealthy eating habits" and how I've "gained a lot of weight in the past few months". I'm pregnant. FML
Today, my mom decided to surprise me by bringing homemade dinner over. I've been living off of ham sandwiches for over a week because I've been too busy and tired from work to cook. Of all the things she could have made, what did she make? Ham sandwiches. Thanks, mom. FML
Today, my parents brought home lunch from a shady grocery store deli. They mused about how hard I am to feed because I turned it down; the last time I ate anything from there, it gave me botulism, and it tastes horrible anyway. They both got sick. Now I'm playing nurse to both. No apologies yet. FML
Today, I cooked for the future in-laws and was accused of trying to poison them. Absolutely no one told me, even as they watched me cook shrimp and smoked sausage gumbo, that my mother-in-law is deathly allergic to shellfish and my father-in-law gets severe diarrhoea when he eats pork. FML
Today, my mom told me she is serving lasagna and Italian cream cake at my bridal shower. I'm severely lactose intolerant, which I have been telling her for years. She responded by telling me, and I quote, "The food is for the guests." FML
Today, I’m at my hometown for the weekend and bought my entire family takeaway for lunch without knowing my mom had cooked. Later, after finding out, I promised to eat it for dinner. Guess who is having food poisoning but can’t shit. The cramps are killing me. FML
Today, my mom slaved over a hot stove making a meal for 20 guests. They all cancelled at the last second. We now have leftovers for 20 people. FML
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Top comments
FluffythePink 23
Where tf is your husband and why isn't he policing his bloody mother? You should be getting all the decent food and drink your body needs to be feeding babe. Whether that's 3 square meals a day or constant light grazing throughout the day. You should also talk to your healthcare person about the depression before it gets any worse. 🫂
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Lock the door or change the locks and make your own lunch.
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Comments (3)
FluffythePink 23
Where tf is your husband and why isn't he policing his bloody mother? You should be getting all the decent food and drink your body needs to be feeding babe. Whether that's 3 square meals a day or constant light grazing throughout the day. You should also talk to your healthcare person about the depression before it gets any worse. 🫂
DLBL 23
Really. MIL will be inviting herself over every day to cook 4 small shrimp and a handful of macaroni. Every single day for a month. You're not thinking straight.
juuuliaaa_fml 28
She just had a baby 2 weeks ago.. of course her brain is not thinking at 100%. We also don't know how long MIL plans to stay. OP I hope you eat all that you need and remember your baby needs you so take care of yourself. 💖
bigredmonkeybutt 30
Lock the door or change the locks and make your own lunch.