Today, I learned that when microwaveable pizzas say, "Caution, hot after cooking" what they really mean is that you should be prepared for the cardboard tray to fall apart when you try to pick it up and that boiling hot cheese is going to run down your arm. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in a rush, I attempted to microwave leftover pizza slices. Unbeknownst to me, I accidentally hit the 'defrost' button, turning the pizza into a lukewarm soggy mess. I guess pizza should never be reheated in 'thaw mode'. FML
Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML
Today, I tried to reheat some leftover pizza in the microwave but forgot to take the plastic wrap off. The microwave filled with smoke, and the plastic melted onto the pizza. I ate burnt plastic-flavored pizza for lunch, because pizza is pizza and I couldn't bring myself to through it away. FML
Today, I learned that just because the actual part of the pan that does touch the stove isn't hot doesn't mean that the handle won't give you third degree burns, a broken nose from passing out from the pain, and an expensive trip to the emergency room. FML
Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML
Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML
Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I was heating up my rig and about to do a dab when the rig piece fell out onto my hotel blanket, melting it, and getting plastic on the rig. Then I went to fan the smoke detector and I grabbed a pizza box, not thinking about if it was empty or not, and pizza flew everywhere as I fanned. FML
Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML
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Top comments
TheMaster15 10
Ohhh buurnnn
Spottedfeather 7
Why was the cardboard still under the pizza ? That's kind of a dumb move to put that in the microwave.
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Comments (186)
TheMaster15 10
Ohhh buurnnn
DaniPandi 22
Burn, baby, burn!
sirbrainiac 2
that was cheesy ^
MichellinMan 20
next time I see a comment like this, I'm going to punch babies.
JacobWithaY 5
That's one a-spicy a-pepperoni
philipino 24
Your gonna need some ice for that burn! Literally . . .
dancersinger124 7
I see this is gonna be on of those FML's where the comments just keep getting worse and worse...
ICATiger 13
31-Thats my cue!!
KeyboardWarrior 10
18 I think we should call 911 in advance then, wouldn't want any babies getting punched.
PedoPancakes 7
AHAHA burn :P
hugsandisses 6
Chuck E Cheeses....where a kid can be a STAR!!! Well back In my day, folks, it was where a kid can be a KiD
HahaHokayThen 10
I don't know about your pizza box, but my pizza box says "Caution: hot after cooking. Oh, the cardboard box may fall apart as well, deeming your arm vulnerable at scorching hot cheese melts onto your skin" yup.
desireev 18
86- The Chuck E Cheese where I live still says 'Where a Kid can be a Kid'..
hugsandisses 6
97 - are you from America? In the commercials its where a kid can be a star and it's advertised threw out their stores. Pretty sure its not just in my area. It's aired on TV and commercials everywhere. Unless they changed it again, bc people were unhappy with jt
goaliemkl123 8
Desireev. Buuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrn. This fml is getting so hot!
causticgirl 6
Where I live it is still "...a kid can be a kid".
hugsandisses 6
Don't think I asked you, nor Desiree ^
TheSnakeDoctor20 17
114- I hate to be a grammar nazi but through*.if you're going to be mean, atleast have the grammar to back it up.
desireev 18
Hey hugsandkisses- when you make a comment like that, you leave it open for anyone to comment on. And I wasn't being shitty with you. All I said was that where I live, which is in Oklahoma in the USA, it's still 'where a kid can be a kid'.. So don't get shitty with me. You made a comment. And, unfortunately for you I guess, it's a public website. Anybody can make a comment to add to yours. I wasn't being shitty with you. So don't be shitty with me. And, to be technical, you didn't ask anybody a question. So don't say '^ I didn't ask you nor desireev'. You made a comment and we simply added to it. People like you are the reason I hate even talking to people. I am an all-around nice girl. I'm always polite and respectful. Then there's people like you who just try to start something. And no.. It wasn't a "burn" for me. A so-called "burn" is an insult where someone was proven wrong or made to look stupid. And the comment didn't do either one of them for or against me. :)
farhil 14
If you're gonna correct grammar, at least correct the right comment...
_Oblivion_ 12
118- nazi, but* If* If you're going to be a grammar nazi, at least have good grammar to start with.
sofineedsaladder 10
hugsandisses, every time I see a comment of yours, I get the strong urge to punch you through the internet. There is no reason to be rude to someone who's not attacking anyone, just simply making a comment.
twilightluvr101 4
Damn 114 way to sound like a bitch
SeaMen 3
the cheese isn't the hot part...its the sauce damn does the sauce burn like a bitch no one can say ydi cuz this happens to everyone
5t3ff1k4h 45
25 - You don't ice a burn.
TheElderTROLLZ 15
I want extra cheesy pizza now!!
GovernorGeneral 8
OH OH. WE GOT A BADASS OVER HERE !! Dunno why i 'shouted' that....enjoy my stupidity.
McFail_fml 4
I know a pizza joke, but i won't say because it's too cheesy.
AntiBody32123 5
Imagine the FML the pizza would post.
OG_Treezy 2
Who really gives a **** though? Honestly dude..
bamagrl410 31
86 - First of all, you said "in my day". The "Where a kid can be a kid" slogan wasn't adopted until late 1990 (look it up), so I highly doubt you're much older than me or anyone else here. It's not like you're so much older and full of wisdom or something, but nice try. And second, if you simply google it & pull up their website you'll notice that it is still currently their slogan. Sorry you got it wrong and are embarrassed, but stop harassing other people because you got something wrong. It's not everyone else's fault. Now, good day.
AntiBody32123 5
Why are people arguing over Chuck E. Cheese anyway? It's a place for kids who cares about the slogan, it was a fun place to be that's all that matters.
megaderp 3
That "you didn't ask anybody a question. so don't say", you're saying, he didn't ask anybody a question, so don't say he didn't ask you a question. Right?
philipino 24
139- It was a joke. Chill. . .
cupcakemann95 7
You should have been careful.. Do not ever doubt the box
Naomimi_fml 6
The box DID warn you.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
I think we should stop relying so much on what the box tells us to do and use our heads for a change. Maybe once all the idiotic warnings are gone, common sense will find it's way back into society.
Jakesterk96 8
The frozen pizzas I buy always says to remove cardboard before placing pizza on baking sheet, but that's just me.
ShyAnn29 15
35, they're talking about it being in the microwave, not the oven
zombicidal 11
hot pockets should warn they will be frozen or filled with molten hot lava
MichellinMan 20
65- yea I like Jim gaffigan too
zombicidal 11
is that what's its from I couldn't remember I know I read it in a rage comic a while ago too
desireev 18
35- The Red Baron mini pizzas have the cardboard in it and you have to use it to cook the pizza. There's a silver side of the cardboard that supposedly helps cook the pizza.
somerandomdude19 2
33- i really doubt it...
raney150 0
33- the warnings are there because common sense was lost a long time ago.
Spottedfeather 7
Why was the cardboard still under the pizza ? That's kind of a dumb move to put that in the microwave.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
Exactly. And is it really that hard to just bake it? Oh wait, some other OP managed to **** that up too.
MichellinMan 20
dammit haven't you people ever eaten microwave pizza? most of them have cardboard trays.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
32, I have tried it but I haven't made it. That shit's nasty and unnaturally chewy. Bleh.
MichellinMan 20
37- it is, but that's what most of them use.
ShyAnn29 15
Some microwaveable pizza is pretty good
TPSerigne 9
I am definitely siding with Shroom, all microwave pizza can be baked in the oven to take some of that disgusting chewiness away.
MichellinMan 20
56- why do think the microwave was invented? Because its faster. lots of foods can microwaved as well as baked. its not all nasty. and plus, I wasn't even arguing. so shut up, please.
ShroomsOnAcid 17
70, I don't see where anyone was arguing with you either. People are just voicing their opinions. Besides, a small microwaveable pizza isn't going to take that much longer to cook in the oven. Most people do have 10 minutes to bake something instead of microwaving it anyway.
TPSerigne 9
70- We aren't out to get you, chill.
MichellinMan 20
99-shut your mouth before I rage
Gringe 1
U comprimised the structural integrity of the cardboard by microwaving it. Also im pretty sure thats not what the box means...
Isaac_The_Man 0
Wow, I have chance for tjird comment AND I CAN'T THINK OF A GOD DAMN PUN!
FiestaInMyPants 8
Damn, you soiled your chance.
MichellinMan 20
it depends on what microwave pizza your eating. Really, it does.
funnynesh 10
#23 what does that have to do with the comment that you commented on?
MichellinMan 20
-40 it was supposed to be the one below this, damn phone.
RussianFox 13
To anyone saying it was OP fault, it's not like they knew it would fall apart
MichellinMan 20
well said sir, well said.
twilightluvr101 4
Yeah but y would u put paper in the microwave...
Guy247bp2 1
Well, now you know...
tingway 4
i don't think you should be microwaving paper..?
leogirl95 12
Never trust microwaveable foods...you never know what they'll do next
Pentium_4 27
oven cooked pizzas are so much better!
TheGianaJinx 0
Buy a Lean Cuisine pizza. The platform they give you to cook on is CARDBOARD. No problem with that.
SecretMe00 5
Did OP have a high thought....
andyyroxx 20
75 - It was cardboard, you piece of ass nugget.
diron314 1
Stupid head!
diron314 1
Yeah
SkoomaKi 28
Cheese for everyone!
upyourzlolz 11
Actually, cheese for that greedy ******* arm.
volleyball1616 1
Thats digirno
Guy247bp2 1
Is that spelled correctly?