Today, I learned that when microwaveable pizzas say, "Caution, hot after cooking" what they really mean is that you should be prepared for the cardboard tray to fall apart when you try to pick it up and that boiling hot cheese is going to run down your arm. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in a rush, I attempted to microwave leftover pizza slices. Unbeknownst to me, I accidentally hit the 'defrost' button, turning the pizza into a lukewarm soggy mess. I guess pizza should never be reheated in 'thaw mode'. FML
Today, I made myself a hot pocket for lunch. I managed to scald myself on the red-hot cheese, and at the same time bite into the center, which was somehow still frozen solid. FML
Today, I tried to reheat some leftover pizza in the microwave but forgot to take the plastic wrap off. The microwave filled with smoke, and the plastic melted onto the pizza. I ate burnt plastic-flavored pizza for lunch, because pizza is pizza and I couldn't bring myself to through it away. FML
Today, I learned that just because the actual part of the pan that does touch the stove isn't hot doesn't mean that the handle won't give you third degree burns, a broken nose from passing out from the pain, and an expensive trip to the emergency room. FML
Today, as I was texting a friend, I was going to warm up some cold pizza. As I got finished with a text I put the pizza in the microwave and set the timer. After the timer ran out, I opened the door and smelled burnt plastic. Turns out phones aren't meant to be in the microwave. FML
Today, I noticed something written on the top of my toaster, so I used a finger to clear away some of the crumbs, burning my finger in the process. The writing? "CAUTION: Hot surface!" Thanks, toaster. FML
Today, while house sitting, I went to take my pizza out of the oven, not realizing that the oven mitt had a hole in it. FML
Today, I got burned, all because the toaster scared me while I was holding a pot of boiling water. FML
Today, I was heating up my rig and about to do a dab when the rig piece fell out onto my hotel blanket, melting it, and getting plastic on the rig. Then I went to fan the smoke detector and I grabbed a pizza box, not thinking about if it was empty or not, and pizza flew everywhere as I fanned. FML
Today, I accepted I can't cook at all. Why? I burned myself cooking popcorn in a microwave oven. I accidentally burst the package open and a scorching kernel flew into my bra. FML
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Top comments
TheMaster15 10
Ohhh buurnnn
Spottedfeather 7
Why was the cardboard still under the pizza ? That's kind of a dumb move to put that in the microwave.
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Comments (186)
Mikko8 15
Next time don't be so lazy and bake your own.
KiddNYC1O 22
I'm guessing you haven't tried DiGiorno?
TalkingTowelTim 0
You live and you learn. Now you learned that when something says its hot, chances are it'll be hot.
hateevryone 15
i know that burned.
upyourzlolz 11
I know that comment has been used on this page about three-hundred times.
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
The only paper that should be going into a microwave should be in the form of a plate. I feel your pain, OP. Though I didn't hurt myself when it happened, only my ego and appetite.
ElricMustang 23
Oh man that must be horrible, but why did you leave the cardboard?
guitardude728 9
i learned that when i put my first pizza in the microwave at age eight
terrask 11
Cardboard tray? That piece of cardboard is only there to hold the ''pizza'' before it's sealed and frozen. Seriously, no one ever taugh you how to use kitchen appliances? Or even ''water + paper = not good'' Wow!
KiddNYC1O 22
A lot of microwaveable pizzas come with some kind of cardboard to use in microwave.
Spottedfeather 7
No. No, they don't.
KiddNYC1O 22
YES THEY DO!! Arrghhh *smashes stuff*
desireev 18
The Red Baron mini pizzas come with a cardboard tray that has a silver side that helps cook the pizza. It even says on the box to use the cardboard tray instead of a plate. And the pizza is yummy as well! :)
KiddNYC1O 22
Yes. So does Celeste, Jeno's, DiGiorno etc.
loller27 6
well...they weren't wrong
asherah14 7
How does a microwave make cheese boil? And how does said boiling cheese roll down an arm?
Schizomaniac 24
The concepts of heat transfer and gravity might help address your inquiries. Don't think too hard, though.
KiddNYC1O 22
Really? What kind of microwave do you use?
Schizomaniac 24
Kenmore. What about you?
KiddNYC1O 22
Sharp. How about, the one who my question was originally directed at, #56?
downtime 13
OMG mines a Sharp too! SOULMATES.
SilentTreatment 7
Mmmmm..... Cheesy pizza. :)