Today, I went camping. My tent is flooded, a raccoon ate all my food, I lost the anchor to my boat which as a result is now across the lake. Three more days. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my friend and I went boating. In the middle of the lake, we decided to jump in. We put our valuables in the boat and jumped in. When I tried to get back in the boat, it flipped over, and our cellphones, along with my car keys, are at the bottom of the lake. FML
Today, my friends and I went camping. In the middle of the night, they carried me deep into the forest and left me there. I stepped on a beehive as I walked back to the tent. FML
Today, I went fishing. Not only did I lose the fish, I lost the entire rod. FML
Today, I was backpacking, and I was in a tent. It had rained all day and finally, I was dry. I settled down in my slightly damp sleeping bag. I woke up halfway through the night with a frog on my face and my feet in freezing cold water. Our tent had drifted into a frog pond. FML
Today, I went camping with my husband. We drove 11 hours to his favourite site before he remembered he didn't put the tent in the car. FML
Today, I was kayaking with my family for my birthday when we tipped over while going down a rocky cascade. My husband badly cut up his arm, and my car keys and my phone both went for a swim and never returned. Great birthday. FML
Today, it's day two of my family's camping trip. Despite the weather, bugs, and portapotties, we were doing okay, until the can opener broke. My husband is stubbornly insisting that we live off cereal and peanut butter for another five days. FML
Today, I was walking my dog through a park with a lake. My dog was swimming in said lake, and then appeared to be having trouble keeping his head up. I put my phone and keys on the ground and waded to my dog. He was fine, but I turned around in time to see someone run off with my stuff. FML
Today, I haven’t been camping since I was a kid. I decided to give it another shot. I bought all the best equipment, researched all the great locations, planned a whole weekend. Turns out I still fucking hate camping and now I’m out over $400. FML
Today, I went on a relaxing nature hike to de-stress. I got lost for hours, encountered a bear, and had to play dead, only for the bear to steal my sandwich then sit there for hours before finally leaving. FML
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Top comments
MtnDew32 0
Look on the bright side...you got internet access! **** everything else!
KennKenn 0
Should call for help instead of posting this.
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Comments (158)
gamerhead 3
Time to swim
the_ace1337 0
Time to remember all that Bear Grylls taught you. Starting with the pee...
TinyDude 10
Stranded across a lake, time to drink ur own piss :)
Zapzip2013 0
Someone's not a "happy camper. "
WallyTheWombat 0
Raccoons are little forest ninjas. I like how everyone thinks "he drank his pee" then they talk about him lol.
liquidfireKAN 0
survivor man actually taught me how to survive this situation
jigiwithit 0
get a strap on, see how much he carries on after you use it on him
DocBastard 40
Jigiwithit - use it on whom, the raccoon? Next time you choose to comment on an FML, try the following: 1) Double check that you're on the correct FML 2) Don't comment on the first comment just to get your comment near the top. No one likes an attention *****. 3) Make a worthwhile comment. Keep these rules in mind and things will go quite smoothly for you.
OceanBreathesSal 5
docbastard you never fail to make me laugh(:
dolphincheddar 10
making people laugh is a valid hobby
juicedboi 7
Just remember what man v wild has taught us. When stranded out in the middle of nowhere with little resources. Run jump and slide over dangerous terrain because risk of injury isn't a factor to worry about. Then when all else fails, drink your urine and find elephant dung! Survival 101 at it's finest
zukinihudini 0
i dont call it camping if you have internet
Magnimus 4
I think jigiwithit was trying to reply to another post.
MtnDew32 0
Look on the bright side...you got internet access! **** everything else!
diabian 9
ya right
bgibbz 15
I just wanna know how the **** she lost an anchor...
RandomPotato 0
I do, too. Plus, how did she not notice that a raccoon was stealing all her food?
iSitt 0
the anchor rope knot was a fail. the raccoon came at night. do you hear banjos?
nativepimp 1
a long list of fail 1. the tent/rain fly 2. didn't store food properly 3 failed at tying a knot on the anchor. 4 the boat should of been tied to shore
mollyjynxjax 28
Should *have*
KennKenn 0
Should call for help instead of posting this.
jess2gd4u 0
he needs bear grylls!
mccaincracker 6
it's likely that they posted this FML after they got home and explained how they felt when this happened.
Serebg1230 0
Well im pretty sure they called for help if they had time to post this :|
OceanBreathesSal 5
you never know. Maybe OP is that stupid and it never occurred to him calling for help.
prince122 0
she said three more days. I'm pretty sure that's a count down for help.
iSitt 0
the only thing bear gryls taught me is when things get tough, check into a hotel.
chickunkey 0
Don't cha just love camping?
MrSassypants 34
I hate campers! Someone was going to say it so I did anyway. 8)
dolphincheddar 10
camping is "intense". well some people don't use tents but still
unvmesucka 0
Cidiots should stay in the city.
amandajlucas2015 2
Maybe u should face the fact that ur not fit for the outdoors
goshpeople 4
Internet access means you could get someone to rescue you, right? Don't spend three days without food.
pardonski 0
I this might be a fake...
Ugi 27
Your smartphone is not going to like the swim to the boat!
btnhdude 0
he can just leave it einstien.
Ugi 27
I know. I was just taking the piss. Sorry for the confusion. PS - I think Tori might be a woman's name.
mfjkr 10
no shit Sherlock
Newboyz00185 0
Uh..... There's an app for that.
ryno101 3
just think, things can't get any worse right?
DocBastard 40
She could get mauled by a bear. She could get stung by a swarm of Africanized bees. It could start violently hailing. She could get giardiasis (look it up). She could be attacked by a herd of vicious wild boars. Can't get worse? Don't you believe it.
cgchamp89 7
lol the list goes on an on...
RedPillSucks 33
She could get hurtful comments from the FML commenters. That would be the worst thing.
DocBastard 40
Now Red, who on EARTH would post hateful comments on FML??
dolphincheddar 10
doc you aren't from earth so therefore you are excuses for your deeds
seenyou 3
stranded without food . first thing u think about is posting it on FML ?
goshpeople 4
I doubt it was the first thing he thought about, but after spending hours there, running out of things to do and slowly getting hungrier, perhaps it came to mind that this was an appropriate FHL situation.
heartbrakej 0
Pull a Bear Grills and kick nature's ass!
heartbrakej 0
or find some elephant poop if you're thirsty.
ambowew 7
1) Drain the tent 2) Eat the racoon 3) Swim out and fetch the ******* boat instead of whinging. Problem solved.
Stoney888 0
1. Read a book on camping 2. Don't choose the lowest spot to pitch your tent 3. Don't leave your food where animals can get to it!!!! Your lucky it wasn't a bear!!!!
KillerSong 11
#13 is hilarious but he has a point :)) instead of whining, do something about it even though it is easier said than done