Today, I work at a chocolate factory on the sanitation shift. I was under a machine cleaning and a spider fell on me. I started freaking out and a coworker thought I got caught in the moving parts and frantically pulled me out and alerted my boss. Turns out it was just a piece of caramel. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked into my boss’s office for a serious meeting. While I was talking, I felt something on my arm, looked down, and realized it was a giant spider crawling up my sleeve. I tried to casually shake it off without screaming, but I just ended up doing a bizarre, silent dance in front of my boss. FML
Today, while I was fitting a new fuse box, a giant spider tried to eat my fingers. As I pulled away, I touched the exposed wires. I woke up flat on my back to the customer slapping my face, burnt fingers, and bruises everywhere. I had also peed and shit myself. FML
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
Today, someone had been stealing my brownie at work every day, so I sprinkled cocolax on one and waited to find out who the culprit was. Turns out it was my manager. Needless to say, I'm fired. FML
Today, I was at a grocery store when I slipped on a puddle of water. I tried to catch my balance, grabbed a shelf, and instead took down an entire display of chocolate boxes. People rushed over to help, albeit while smirking, and a kid yelled, “Do it again!” FML
Today, I was eating lunch outside with my friends, when a spider fell on one guy's back. I glanced at it and opened my mouth to warn him when another guy flicked it and it went into my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML
Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML
Today, I woke up to a spider crawling across my face. I was so shocked that my new house had spiders, I jumped up out of bed, only to slip on the floor and land face down onto the bed. Wouldn't you know it, right where the spider was at that point. I can still taste the juice I squished out of it. FML
Today, I was working and eating. I was so tired that I bit into my pen and smeared my chocolate-filled pastry on my exercise book. FML
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Top comments
ilikesexyparties 0
aw, at least you have a sweet coworker
MmmHotWaffles 0
so..is the caramel alright?
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Comments (87)
Occam 0
You work in CHOCOLATE FACTORY? And you think your life is ******?!
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
Yeah... My teacher said she used to work at a factory that made chocolate-covered cherries and someone actually died by falling into the vat of chocolate. I'm not sure how that applies here, but still, it's an interesting story. Uhm... I guess I can side with you. I hate spiders, and I usually flip out when I think one is on me, even if it isn't a spider (like a hair that fell out, for instance). But I don't know if this is really a FYL. It's definitely not a YDI though...
ayenii 14
Chocolate-covered corpses. Yum. Or corpse flavored chocolate?
AnaMaree 0
God you're an idiot.
jamblasticus 0
I have to agree with AnaMaree, you are incredibly idiotic.
showwstopper 0
and you thougght that was an fml whyy ?
lilacwords 0
I want your job. But, not an FML, I think the OP was just bragging about their job.
DearlyBeloved 0
I hope you're a girl.
ButterFly_16 0
Don't feel bad I'm really scared of spiders too :( But WOW!
Phoenix_GAD 0
LOL 6!!! and i feel for ya. i am TERRIFIED of spiders.. i think it goes way past the point of being a phobia.. o_O
cselby 0
ahah are you really that scared of spiders? i mean they really aren't out to hurt you and there like 50x smaller than you. i woulda just flicked that shit off..but nonetheless. YDI.