Today, my coworker and I were sitting and eating lunch. We noticed a little kid kept staring at us, and every time we looked away he would come a little bit closer. When he was right behind us, I looked and was startled enough to jump. The parents were three tables down, laughing uncontrollably. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was eating at a restaurant in town, when a small boy started looking at me. I simply smiled and went back to eating, only to hear out of the corner of my ear, "Daddy, why does that kid's face look like that"? He said it so loud, the three tables next to us turned and looked. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant when I made eye contact with a baby across the room. It smiled at me, so I smiled back. The baby immediately started screaming. Everyone stared at me like I'd just threatened it. FML
Today, I was at Disneyland with some of my friends. While eating lunch, we watched a small child get frightened by the person dressed as Mickey Mouse. We all burst out laughing only to be jumped by Chip and Dale. Apparently I scream louder than the little kid. FML
Today, a coworker at school yelled at one of our students to be quiet. The kid got pretty upset, so I went to comfort him. He held my hand for the rest of the class, telling me in vivid detail how he was going to kill my coworker. Now I'm afraid to look at him. FML
Today, I was having breakfast when my mom's boyfriend came and sat right across from me. He didn't try and hide the fact that he was staring at my chest and told me, "Wow, you're getting bigger." I glared at him. He winked at me. FML
Today, at work I got a message from some dude trying to flirt with me. While I was cracking up and making fun of him with my friends, I get a message from him saying look directly behind you, and there he was staring at me. FML
Today, my toddler stood up in a shopping cart and fell, giving himself a black eye. Later, while at a restaurant, he tried to stand up in his high-chair. I quickly blurted out, "Sit down! Do you want another one of those?" while pointing at his eye. The waiter wouldn’t stop glaring at me. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML
Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML
Today, my coworker brought her 3-year-old son to work with her. When introducing him to me, she dropped her bag and bent over to pick it up, knocking him over with her butt in the process. When she stood up, she noticed he was sitting on the ground crying. She then accused me of pushing him over. FML
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Top comments
brohamas16 7
Hah I'd make my kid do the same thing
Pleonasm 36
Slenderman: Origins
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Comments (145)
brohamas16 7
Hah I'd make my kid do the same thing
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Those parents are awesome.
RaggleFrock 13
He's the human version on ninja cat. I salute his parents!
kat4x1track 5
I'm pretty sure someone would slap the kid if they were scared enough. Haha
meganfoxissexy 0
Little kids can get away with that kind of stuff :)
ConBroChilll 9
Is this the heir of slenderman?
guitarist410 5
7, 8, he has a rake?
looloothing 9
It's like those angels on Dr Who.
supapeas 0
This should be on Not Always Right OP MAKE IT HAPPEN
Accuraxy 10
Watch out OP..he's coming for you..
graffitied_love 20
Yea he's coming for you! All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better run better run, faster than my gun :)
SweetieForEva 3
All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better run and run faster than my bullet
sheethapins 13
1... 2... Their kid's coming for you...
SqueakyChipmunk 22
67) 3, 4, better lock your door.
spiritfang11237 16
88- 5. 6. Hear the cracking sticks?
technochik3 12
watcha gonna do when he comes for you?
SammyS2012 21
88- it should be "5,6 grab a crucifix"
Pleonasm 36
Slenderman: Origins
ALlamaOnFire 20
No no, IT'S THE WEEPING ANGELS! Doctor Who anyone... :)
Pleonasm 36
The comment you're looking for is down there: vvv (#12) :p
Axipiter 24
This is not the comment you're looking for...
laden_swallow09 35
He can go about his business…
LiesAndMischief 4
Slenderman's a better reference in my opinion, anyway. :P
StoryOfTheYear 15
And the static grew in strength, filling the whole screen.
radioinvader 9
Good thing I work at a service centre. That kid was long gone by the time I left that day.
SammyS2012 21
they're coming to get you Barbara... Er... OP.
Cartera 10
Makes me think of the Paranormal Activity 4 commercial for some reason..
sumbum95 15
I saw that last night... Creeepy.
SqueakyChipmunk 22
Stupid*
Girreth 7
Not sure if SCP reference or Minecraft reference...
SenselessPattern 12
God damnit, which one of you D-Class personnel let SCP-173 out of containment? You're going to be [REDACTED] immediately.
jewwybeanzzz 10
Enderman! Don't look into his eyes!
ApologyKick 25
Quick, kill the parents. Wouldn't want them to raise more kids and teach them to be trolls.
FlyinTurtle 7
Well that escalated quickly!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
That didn't escalate, that skyrocketed.
Welshite 40
He's watched the Ninja Cat video too many times.
SanpakuEyes 18
Totally what I was thinking! lol
gracehi 33
Me too! It's a ninja baby!
BriannaRWatson 13
Children these days...bahaha!
CheeseTron 15
What are you? A sheep?
CheeseTron 15
Nevermind guys. Totally thought that was a "b"
CheeseTron 15
Wait a second! It is a "b"! Sheep! Sheeeeeeeeeeeep!
SqueakyChipmunk 22
What.
Pleonasm 36
The.
Posthuman 26
Snergle.
SenselessPattern 12
If a sheep went "bahaha", I would probably shit a brick.
MormonPornstar 7
Sheep do make that noise. Just uh... FYI
sheethapins 13
Really? And all this time I thought they just said "baa." Thank goodness for you to correct me on this, now quick call all child book authors and toy makers so they can make the necessary adjustments.
mhopper 13
Red light! Green light!
crimsonlover4 31
Slenderman.
crimsonlover4 31
Guess nobody enjoys "Red light. Green light. Slenderman" like I do. *shrugs*
SqueakyChipmunk 22
I don't. I like to throw raves for him.