Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then "All By Myself" came on the radio. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
Today, I decided to make new friends, so I sat with the lonely guy at lunch. Now he keeps following me, with his phone in a camera position. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
Today, I took the time to make myself look nice just so that the pizza guy would think I had a life. FML
Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML
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Top comments
narkill 13
5 dollar foot lonely.
filip00 16
Since when are people so obsessed about trying to impress random strangers? Who cares if you're alone or with someone?
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Comments (55)
andreaor 7
you're a unique species of loser...why do you care about what random strangers think and it's not like people don't go places alone...
AnimeBitch 14
Douche.
perdix 31
There was a cute girl who wanted to talk to you, but when she saw you were with someone, she decided to leave you alone.
SWC_Penguin 17
Don't get his hopes up like that. No one in the history of ever has attempted to hit on a stranger at Subway.
perdix 31
#32, people hit on each other in morgues, slaughterhouses and crematoria. Certainly, someone, somewhere made a move at a Subway.
RedPillSucks 33
Rule 34... *She was eyeing his "foot-long" with anticipation, when she realized he didn't even have the $5 to buy her one, so she left, unsatisfied*
kinky44 28
@54 That's not Rule 34. Be thankful you don't know what real Rule 34 is.
1dvs_bstd 41
The lonliness is strong with this one.
XDsmileyDX_fml 24
How do you ever expect to meet new people when they might not talk to you because you are already with someone?
starile 20
People don't only talk to people who are alone. Haven't you ever approached a group of girls at a club before?
kaylee_megan 16
I don't see why people don't like eating or doing stuff alone. It gives you the chance to think about yourself and to do what you want to do. And on the plus side you don't have to split the bill.
perdix 31
I like eating alone. In fact, I tried to start a club for like-minded people, but no one came to the meetings...even when I handed out free food! Go figure!
jw90 18
Wonder or wander? Which one were you going for OP?
perdix 31
#21, I was also wandering about that. I was going to write something, but then my mind wondered.
jw90 18
I wander a lot of things.
beelee1988 13
Finally someone said something about that.
RedPillSucks 33
Grammar Nazis were asleep. Timmy is still stuck in the whale.
henson7247 5
Forever alone
JaneDoe1024 6
OP you care too much what others think! I have a bf and yet I eat alone all the time. just because you're alone doesnt make you appear lonely.
gemstone586 12
Apparently these ppl commenting have never been truly alone. Where there's no one to call and you've eaten the last 100 meals alone and you get tired of being alone and even if no one else does, you know how terribly pitiful you feel, being alone once again.... I always just played on my cell phone to make it look like i was doing something important, even if i was only playing word search.... Fyl, OP. :/ Try online dating? Worked for me...
jw90 18
A lot of people know the pain of being alone. Others deal differently. But sometimes you've just got to suck it up and actually do something to change it. Cuz doing nothing gets you nowhere.