Today, feeling bored and lonely, I drove into town to wander around the shops and go to Subway for lunch. While there, I picked up two trays and put one on the opposite side of the table, along with some of my rubbish, to make it look like I was with someone. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ate out, even though I was tired. When my main course arrived, I realised I had sent both my forks away with the starter plate. Rather than say anything, I ate dinner with two knives. FML
Today, I managed to not think too much about how alone I feel living in a strange city, and I went out to find a quiet place to write and eat. After I ordered my meal, I saw that I was the only diner that was sitting alone at a table. Then "All By Myself" came on the radio. FML
Today, I invited my girlfriend to go eat out, hoping to put her in a really romantic mood. She decided to tell her friend, who then invited herself and another couple along. I ended up being made fifth wheel, and had to sit alone at an adjacent table. FML
Today, I decided to make new friends, so I sat with the lonely guy at lunch. Now he keeps following me, with his phone in a camera position. FML
Today, I ordered takeout. When I looked in the bag, I saw they'd included four sets of plastic cutlery. In other words, someone at the restaurant packed my order, then estimated that there must be at least four people eating such a large meal. I was eating alone. FML
Today, I was getting a pedicure to cheer myself up. I've been so lonely, I got overly excited when someone sat next to me, because I got to pretend I had a friend. FML
Today, I felt so lonely that I went on an online chat website and pretended to be a girl just so someone would talk to me. FML
Today, I went to the drive-through and ordered 5 cheeseburgers. I told the cashier that some of them were for my girlfriend. I don't have a girlfriend, and I ate all of them by myself. FML
Today, I took the time to make myself look nice just so that the pizza guy would think I had a life. FML
Today, I was so lonely that I had a conversation with myself on my way home. It was only when I reached my apartment complex that I discovered that my neighbour had been walking behind me, laughing to himself the whole way. FML
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Top comments
narkill 13
5 dollar foot lonely.
filip00 16
Since when are people so obsessed about trying to impress random strangers? Who cares if you're alone or with someone?
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Comments (55)
swishsimpson 7
the video camera in subway can not be fooled!!
khaya 9
Being lonely with rubbish is probably worse than just being by yourself
dirtydiana57 3
Why would you do that? There's nothing wrong with grabbing a little lunch by yourself. You care far too much what strangers think of you.
awkwardturtl3 3
but ppl around you who saw that knew you were alone..
Hutch1965 6
Here's the thing. Your life is not that pathetic. You just THINK it is. Stop worrying about what strangers are going to think, and you will be a lot happier.
Ashley868 10
Wouldn't people figure out you're by yourself eventually? There is no shame in eating alone.
GoodLookingGeese 10
Dear OP, I'll give you an advice. Start doing something productive. Successful people have as many friends as they wish. No one wants to be with bored losers. Sorry if I offended you with my comment but the truth is that it absolutely lays in your hands. So grow balls and do something productive, someday you might be great at it and you'll see you're never ever alone again. Good luck
tehdarkness 21
You should go to therapy.
diarheea101 11
life sucks.
rgri 11
Someome needs to make friends...