Today, while at a local bar, my friends and I were approached by an overly intoxicated man who asked us each politely if we wanted to fight. Thinking it was a joke, I said yes. It wasn't a joke, I now have a broken nose and a black eye. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML
Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML
Today, I was at the bar and my friend and I were making fun of this guy wearing a Affliction muscle tee and bedazzled Ed Hardy hat. We were saying how he was the epitome of a douche bag and that he probably likes UFC. Turns out he's an MMA fighter and I now have a broken nose. FML
Today, I woke up in hospital after a night of heavy drinking. My friends told me I was beat up by the doorman. After going to the club to watch the security footage, it was revealed I actually fell on my face trying to fight, and caused more damage to myself. FML
Today, my friends showed me a video of me blind drunk last night, getting into a fight with my front door. The door won, unlike my face. FML
Today, I got a black eye while trying to break up a fight caused by some complete bastard making a "yo momma" joke at the funeral of my best friend's mother. FML
Today, I was at the gym when I saw one of my friends at the water fountain. I went over and gave him a man ass slap while he was drinking. It wasn't my friend. I now have a black eye. FML
Today, I was down the pub with a mate and we got onto the subject of bar fights. I said I thought being glassed wouldn't actually hurt that much. My friend looks at me, calmly finishes his pint and then swiftly smashes his glass over my head. Turns out I was wrong. And we got kicked out. FML
Today, I got into a nasty fight, and ended up leaving with a black eye. The fight was with a champagne bottle cork. I was opening the bottle to celebrate the New Year, at home, alone. FML
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
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Top comments
5t3ff1k4h 47
Never challenge drunks, even if you think they're joking. Period.
scottiealan 0
WTF don't mess with drunks! they are always serious with what they say, why do u think they tell you their secrets
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Comments (128)
cchristine 0
Sober words come from drunken hearts.
hawkmcge3 0
that's rly nice, and did u fight back?
alizax3 0
lol... that's what I was gnna say (x
PurplePigeon 0
16: that doesn't make sense.
cchristine 0
you don't make sense, loserrrr.
WiseGuy79 14
You deserve it for letting a random drunk slap your ass around Next time say no n go back to your wine spritzer haha
trillion625 0
ydi for not knowing how to fight
WarmedIce 0
[ Insert clever bar joke here] op ydi for fighting a drunk man and losing.
CloudEnvy 17
A man walks into the bar holding jumper cables. The bartender looks him up and down then says "You can come in. Just don't start anything."
jojoboo1 0
the first rule of fight club is.......
yourlifesfucked 0
id tell you but the second rule is dont talk about fight club.
number0 8
What fight club?
alizax3 0
yess now let's just agree to fight with a drunk guy. yaa know not expecting to actually fight or anything... |:
LeexaaFreeszh 0
That sucks; lmao xD
MorganMuffin25 0
Ha, your fault for saying yes.
DivinexHeratic 0
OP walks into a bar, but leaves with a broken nose and a souled heart. Hmm, guess there was a punchline to that joke.
DivinexHeratic 0
soiled*
Ariasmake_1 0
how you loose a fight to a drunk guy?? why didn't your friends help you?!