Today, it's my birthday. All I wanted was birthday sex, but all my boyfriend could talk about was how great the new purse he got me was. I think he might like it more than me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend had promised that the day would belong to me. But no, I had to drive 80km forth and back to pick him up from work, then he took pictures with his new camera lens, then he decided what to eat, demanded a massage, and then he just fell asleep. Happy birthday to me. FML
Today, the only thing I got for my birthday was my boyfriend's offer to give me "the gift of anal". FML
Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML
Today, it was my birthday. My boyfriend made me breakfast in bed, then we went out shopping, had a picnic, watched a good romcom, had a fancy dinner, and ended the day with great sex. And when the clock struck twelve, he dumped me. FML
Today, for my birthday, my boyfriend presented me with his cock with a ribbon on it. Basically, HE wanted sex for MY birthday and had the nerve to accuse me of being ungrateful. For his birthday last month, I gave him multiple Xbox games. He couldn’t even be bothered to get me flowers. FML
Today, it's my birthday. I told my boyfriend I wanted to feel special even if for just one day. He said he would do the laundry for me. FML
Today, as it's my birthday, I was hoping for a nice present from my boyfriend. What did he get me? A PornHub account. FML
Today, it's the day after my birthday. My boyfriend got me nothing. Nor did he do anything for me for Valentine's Day. Whereas I got him an $85 game for his birthday, planned a surprise visit to his family so he could see them and his pets, and spent all day Valentine's Day making the house spotless, as well as cakes. FML
Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend’s birthday is a month before mine. I'd spent my birthday savings on his, but he told me that we couldn’t do anything for mine because, “I didn’t plan or organize better.” FML
Today, rather than get me a birthday present, my boyfriend just got angry that I got gifts from other people. Apparently, it "made him feel guilty." FML
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Top comments
HeyMondayAddict 4
Maybe he just feels really good about getting you something.
UnikornG33K 12
Aw that sucks, but at least he got you something, right?
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Comments (175)
Spazz420 7
Honey your boyfriend is gay!
jessrawwr 0
At least he's not all about sex? :/
perdix 31
Well, now that President Obama supports letting gay people get married, you two crazy kids have a fighting chance for marital bliss!
tonygar 17
Well Happy Birthday!! I want the same thing...& it's not the purse
pennies_lane 6
Well I think that's cute! But don't be surprised if you one day catch him prancing around the house with it in your heals.
Kathts7 12
How 'bout telling him how much you love the purse, kiss him and then ask him if he wants to take you hard in the bed. If hé declines, maybe you should cobsider that he might ve gay?
BrickWalls 2
Quit Complaining :) Sucks but atleast you got something.
ifoundalaska 11
81 you forgot 3) but gifts
LigerFan 1
Did he know what you really wanted?
Synistiel 14
He's just happy he found something you'll probably like. Kinda selfish you aren't happy for him and that it's a FML to you because you didn't get sex.