Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
As if it needed to be said, her actions were snot for the greater good.
Doortje 30
Oh my.. *shudders* *shudders again* Brr. Yuck.
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Comments (84)
AnnyPants22 0
Oh my god. Your girlfriend is a ******* pig.
iMandyx3 5
she's a keeper >.<
screamo_neve 12
Can you say "animal"? That is disgusting.
ppdunn 0
Gross! and you're still seeing her why???
marc_with_a_c 3
and you suck for not pushing her away or simply stopping, unless you didnt notice her clearing her throat while you two were making out.. which seems impossible to me
2sad2bad 2
Why are you still referring to this person as "my girlfriend"? Unless you actually enjoy being disrespected and mistreated?
ashrandom 0
EWW. Dump her.
smexiibabe22 0
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwh , yeah FYL that's disgusting !
UnanomousGurl 0
The real question iz..... Y didnt u push HER away!?!?
yesiyes 0
he LIKED it,he wanted to try something different,geeezes..
charvisioku 22
That... is ******* vile.