Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
As if it needed to be said, her actions were snot for the greater good.
Doortje 30
Oh my.. *shudders* *shudders again* Brr. Yuck.
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Comments (84)
maddyjayneexox 4
haha that's nasty...next time simply pull away if it happens and kiss her neck or something...
salsalover_12 5
i gagged and threw up in my mouth a bit
HSP 0
This is so well known, why do girls keep doing this? -.-'
Countrygrrl88 0
Time for a new girlfriend?
domosumo 0
That better be a really hot pig you were kissing..
AcidReign 0
She better be worth it, and she better be grateful you didn't dump her
Susatayy 0
wow thats gross and inconsiderate
spottie 0
That's really mean; and disgusting.
MrBigMeat_fml 0
you're scarred for life my friend
spicywatermelon 0
That's repulsive. Kick that nasty bitch off next time. Or dump her.