Today, instead of pushing me away or simply stopping for a minute, my girlfriend kept kissing me as she was trying to get phlegm out of her throat. The slimy goo ended up in the back of my mouth. I can still taste it. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML
Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML
Today, while kissing my girlfriend's neck, I sneezed a blob of snot onto her. She told me that "it doesn't matter", while hiccuping a bit of vomit. FML
Today, I kissed my girlfriend for the first time. She recoiled in horror and asked if someone had taken a shit in my mouth. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. Trying to be suave, he put a Kool-Fruit between his teeth and motioned for me to kiss him so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do so, I inhaled, swallowing it. He then had to watch me dry-retching as I tried to get it back up. FML
Today, I was watching a romantic comedy at my boyfriend's house. During the make out scene, I decided to go in for a kiss. He apparently decided to belch at the same time. I could taste it. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on the couch. He held a Kool Fruit in his teeth, and motioned for me to kiss him, so he could put it in my mouth. Just as he was about to do this, I inhaled. He then had to watch me dry retching, trying to get it back up. FML
Today, while picking up my extremely drunk girlfriend from a party, she insisted on attempting to make out with me. She threw up in my mouth mid-kiss. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I was helping an old lady at my job. While I was in mid-sentence, she coughed wet phlegm directly into my mouth. It tasted vile and caused me to have a panic attack while working. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
As if it needed to be said, her actions were snot for the greater good.
Doortje 30
Oh my.. *shudders* *shudders again* Brr. Yuck.
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Comments (84)
lionheart822 13
just goes to show that some men are willing to put up with anything to get some action. *sigh*
MissBunny25 0
I literally almost puked when I read this. I would have thrown her down a well and tied lassie up so she wouldn't let anyone know she was down the well... *gag*
Leebra 6
I'm litterally gagging. Blech
JeralynBoox3 0
EWWWWW !! wtf !! that shit is so fuckinggg GROSS !! i would've thrown uppp !!!! ewwwww >.<
davek 36
Her slimy goo in your mouth? Well, now you know how *she* feels.
SayPeanuts 29
Hahaha win!
asherah14 7
Totally different. You know what to expect when his slimy goo gets in your mouth. You don't expect any slimy goo from kissing.
fiveonefiveoh 0
that's hot
yesiyes 0
totally!
lil_lala209 5
that is GROSS! ditch her quick!
aruss721 0
eww...why didn't YOU push her away?
rockinbecca2 4
sick wth is wrong with her? unless if ur just that good of a kisser. but wen u guys break up no one will want cuz of herr.. loogy eww :(
MissUnperfect 0
Haha the only thing anyone is saying is "thats hot" , "EWWW" and or "why didnt you push her away?" My question is why didnt you just spit it right back in her face? then the taste would be gone...and she'd get a taste of her own medicine:) ahaha