Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
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Top comments
seemetrot_fml 16
Somehow I feel like this is a common occurrence for university students..
Elielili 13
Beer tastes like piss anyways, you won't notice the difference;)
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Comments (36)
aelarol 5
99 bottles of piss in my room, 99 bottles of piss...........
hamiltonma 22
Genius or lazy? That is the real question! Haha
rebeccabyram 15
Top it off with beer, chill it and give it too him. Perfect revenge
mwali02 32
Good thing the semester is almost over. I hope that you can start looking for new living arrangements OP... I wouldn't tolerate that.
Bonafonte 24
Ew, that has got to smell. Be strong, OP!
SmittyJA24 26
Get a new roommate next semester... Good luck!
travidebla 8
Wait until he forgets and he tries to take a sip of that. Karma
EmmaMK 35
He was just copying the behaviour of a couple of disgusting English football players.
FelicityWishes 32
Real penis envy right now.
AviShtap 20
Same! Right now, I've got some real Freudian feels going.
goozeo 11
Way of the road Bubbs