Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I walked into my roommate's room to ask him a question, only to see a pitcher with over a pint of urine in it sitting on his bookcase. This is at least the fifth conversation in a year I've had with him about not peeing in containers in his room. FML
Today, I woke up to a strange wetness covering my body. My drunk roommate's urine. FML
Today, my roommate came home after a night of heavy drinking and started urinating on my bed. When I confronted him, he just slurred, "Sorry, thought it was my bed." FML
Today, my extremely lazy roommate is in bed with the flu. Instead of getting up to get water, he's run the garden hose through his window, and instead of going to the bathroom, he's connected a siphon to his penis and run it to a 5-gallon bucket. I have to live with this idiot. FML
Today, I drank from a soda can that was on my floor. Unfortunately, it was my boyfriend’s pee. He was too lazy to go to the bathroom. FML
Today, my roommate moved out. When I went into his room, I found a few things he forgot. Specifically, his beer bottle filled with nail clippings. I emptied it onto my hand before I realized what it was. FML
Today, I woke up to find that I'd left my clothes in my roommate's bedroom. After returning from a night of heavy drinking, I apparently got up to use the bathroom and used her room as a toilet. I don't remember this, but pee stains don't lie. FML
Today, I woke up to hear my boyfriend drunkenly crashing around in the living room, after peeing in an ashtray because he thought it was a urinal. FML
Today, I walked in on one of my housemates pissing in the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes. FML
Today, upon waking up, I took a sip on what I thought was a cup of water on my nightstand. I quickly discovered it was my roommate's cup of used mouthwash which she was too lazy to throw out the night before. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
seemetrot_fml 16
Somehow I feel like this is a common occurrence for university students..
Elielili 13
Beer tastes like piss anyways, you won't notice the difference;)
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (36)
metazoanhaddock 11
Was he perhaps playing video games with a bra on his head?
LwyrUp 13
I'd get a new roommate.
Thepicheese 8
Is your roommate a skeleton by chance?
mattrd_fml 31
My dad did the same thing. He would piss in a jar while on the couch watching tv so he wouldn't have to walk "all the way" to the bathroom. FYL OP.
SkullLove 14
I had a roommate that used to do the same with his empty 2 Liter soda bottles. Those are the same bottles his dog liked to chew. The dog didn't know he wasn't supposed to chew the full one on the floor in his domain. His room got drenched in his own piss.
shinikageWolf 15
Just sit back and wait for "****!" As he forgets which beer bottles are beer and which are piss.
randommanwill 11
I don't get why people do that. I'd need more than one bottle haha
__doge__ 15
I wanna imagine that he was laying on his back