Today, frustrated with my very energetic kids, I told them that if they dug a hole deep enough in the backyard, they'd find China. What they really found was the previous owner's dog. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was digging the foundation for what will eventually be my garage. My kids wanted to help Daddy, which means they had a front row seat with their little spades when we unearthed the skeleton of some previous homeowner's dog. Now they won’t stop crying. FML
Today, I was outside searching for "treasures" with my son using small plastic shovels. All of a sudden he starts screaming. He dug up the bones of our old dog. I told him that we had sent him away to live on a farm, I even helped my son write letters to the farm owners. FML
Today, my dog died. My parents told me to bury it out back. In the process, I managed to dig up my cat. FML
Today, I realized burying my dog underneath our swing-set was a bad idea. My two sons are now scarred for life. FML
Today, I sent my kids to play in the back garden and immediately heard them screaming. We buried our dog last week and last night some animal dug her up and spread the bones and rotting flesh around. The stench was horrendous, the kids are traumatized, and I vomited while reburying the bits. FML
Today, I told my daughter that we were going to the beach. Today, my daughter also tried to dig up our deceased dog, who we buried in our back yard last week, so he could come along. FML
Today, I had my boss and his family over for dinner. Our kids played while waiting for dinner to be ready. Just as we were sitting to eat, our 8-year-olds ran out and my son says "Look at Baxter! I found underwear with a tail hole!" They had found my crotchless panties and put them on the dog. FML
Today, my new dog unburied my old dog and chewed on his bones. FML
Today, my dog was barking at a squirrel in the yard. I opened the door to let him chase the squirrel. I went to look at the dead squirrel and found out it was the neighbor's chihuahua. FML
Today, my three idiot nephews dug up a vintage bomb while "digging a hole to China." I told them not to touch it, and went in to call the police. As I did so, they took it to a pawn shop to sell as an antique. The pawn shop called the cops on them, and the cops are now on to me as they're crying, saying selling it was my idea. FML
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Top comments
shaar_fml 33
Close enough.
mexican_music 13
well duh
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Comments (50)
shaar_fml 33
Close enough.
theKevmeister 13
. . .leftover Chinese
Jonkbaby 23
was the dog ok doe.
xx000o 27
At least they were going the right way.
mexican_music 13
well duh
DFMLharsh 20
^ the force is strong with this one.
Exaspera 55
Mommy, we have a surprise for you!
EclipseCandy6 24
Aw that's awful :(
ScarredVox92 16
Talk about traumatized children.
Hoopachi 19
Why is this downvoted? I'm pretty sure you guys wouldn't feel happy if you found the previous's owners dead dog whilst looking for China.
Thoricsteam20 24
Poor kids though.
ringaringaring 16
Dug. And poor kids D:
coldasfire 23
what...?
hasooon 24
Was he from china?
extrasnipes 22
Or was his/her name China?
Liamj774 36
At least your kids now know they're a delicacy in China.
sexymomo1234 20
Keep digging! Might find a dinosaur!
Calacor 17
this needs more likes^
igive 29
Don't tell me what to do!
EarlFug 19
Or Jimmy Hoffa
amileah13 26
Well that escalated quickly.
thesmeagol 22
That excavated quickly.
zaidthunder1 27
They descended too quickly.