Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, a guy I like asked me to a dance. Trying to act modest and at the same time compliment him, I told him, "You could do so much better, though." After thinking for a moment, he replied, "You're right, I could. Never mind," and walked away. FML
Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML
Today, although I can't dance, I decided to go to a club. A really cute girl asked me to dance, and I politely declined. She kept insisting, so I finally said okay. A few minutes in, she stopped, looked at me, and said, "If you're going to make fun of my dancing, I'm leaving." FML
Today, I was texting the guy I like. I asked him why our friend didn't want to come to the movies with us. He replied, "She didn't want to be the third wheel, but it's not like I'm going to put the moves on you. I'm out of your league, and you're socially awkward anyway." That's just what I wanted. FML
Today, after finally asking my crush for his number, and telling him the reason being he's the only friend whose number I don't have, he laughed, then asked, "Why would I ever be your friend?" FML
Today, I was talking to my guy friend about prom. I told him I was turned down by 7 guys. So he said, "Well, you could always ask me." I then said, "Do you want to go to prom with me?" His response was, "Nope… now that's 8!" FML
Today, I was at a friend's party. All of the sudden, my friend goes, "Ok girls, get a guy to dance with." Then everyone scrambled to find someone. There was just enough guy-girl pairs. This hot girl and I were the only two left. She looked at me and said, "Umm, I have to use the bathroom." FML
Today, I was at a party. The music changed to a slow dance. Everybody grabbed a partner and I was left on the dancefloor alone. Suddenly, this guy walked up to me. I swore that he was going to ask me to dance. He then said, "Could you hold me my drink?" and went to dance with another girl. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML
Today, I went to a dance with the boy I like. To my delight, he tried to pick me up. To my dismay, he couldn't. FML
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Top comments
enormouselephant 15
Why is this guy your friend? Asshole.
Batterypost 23
I reckon it's time to find yourself a new friend.
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Comments (89)
ICastillo 25
Well the way it's sounding your friend is going to be alone and stroking the mushroom tip for a long time.
winkydog4056 16
#32_I've heard a lot of euphemisms for male self-pleasure, but you have shown me one can never stop learning new things.....Thanks! I will leave you to your mushrooms.
ICastillo 25
Well winkydog I'm glad I could help. Join the dark side and you will learn many new things.
deathtothepix 26
He was probably was so rude because you're 'just friend's (and cause he's a dick) but you have to feel sorry for him cause he's never gonna get laid with that attitude.
darkmis1 18
He doesn't deserve you as a friend, OP! I bet you're beautiful!
fmladdict82 1
You need a new friend
lrv96 6
You should have said, yeah well looks like no one is desperate enough to go with you.
ladylilly25 20
"Friend"?
johnny_derp 3
sounds like every "nice guy" that says they're in the "friendzone", because teh evil wimminz never date nice guys like me.
randomtiings44 9
Was he actually being serious??
TheyCallMeDamien 18
OUCH! Well at least you know where you stand.
rosesong2494 3
What an absolute fucktard (******* retard)!! If I were you, I would've walked off without saying anything and continued to ignore him for well after the dance. Either that or smacked him upside the head, called him a prick and stormed off. Whichever works for you. Either way, I think it's time to find a new friend.