Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, thirty minutes after the end of a great date with a great girl, she texted me, "Yeah, uh, never come near me again." FML
Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML
Today, the girl I have a crush on texted me to go out tonight. When I got to her house, she peered at me quizzically and asked, "What do you want? Did I text you?" FML
Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML
Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML
Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way, my mother said, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then said, "Does he know that?" FML
Today, my parents met my boyfriend's parents for the first time… while they were bailing us out of jail. FML
Today, I saw the girl I had confessed my love to two years ago on the bus. We chatted for a few minutes and she got off on the first stop, saying that this is where she had to get off. Twenty minutes later, I see her in the bus next to mine. The bus number was 20. Like mine. FML
Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML
Today, I went on a date with a guy I had been talking to online for weeks. When I showed up, he looked nothing like his profile picture, and he spent the entire time talking about his ex-girlfriend. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
"Don't worry, he's yelling at my brother who is talking to my mom."
DameGreyWulf 1
Hm, high school... chances are your father is right.
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Comments (149)
erowlyn 0
I love how you only care that she is a perfect 10
failuristic 3
Wow, really? Well, y'know, if they really are a "perfect 10" then chances are they probably are ******... Sooo... YDI for rating women and trying to get a date with a ***** :)
startafire 0
You're father's most likely right, kiddo.
wowimnotaklutz 0
ydi for rating girls on a scale of 1 to 10 you ass
DeathShad0 1
And girls don't rate guys? Shut the hell up.
Rach_star 0
Your dad is awesome
michaelcarell 0
What a dick
I_am_stupid_also 6
The sad part is now she will be so worried about her reputation that she will stop putting out.
kindness 0
i would have been sympathetic if you described her for her wonderful personality and your dad just said it for no reason. she probably is a *****. but if not, you don't deserve her anyway if all you care about is her looks.
right_on 0
YDI for going out with a *****
nishantshah 0
not 'her' father.. it was 'his' father..