Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I finally got a date with one of the hottest girls in school, a perfect 10. Just before I go to pick her up to go to the movies, I called her to find out where she lives. She answered the phone, only to hear my father yelling in the background, "STOP TALKING TO THAT WHORE." FML
Today, I went on my first date in months. My mum had invited friends over, and when I told them I was going out on a date, my mum said "No you're not, don't lie. Who would go out with you?" FML
Today, I faked a sore throat for the school nurse so I could go home early. It took my dad the rest of the school day just to get there to pick me up. FML
Today, my mom had an appointment with my teacher after class. She never showed. My teacher ended up driving me home. FML
Today, my mom decided to follow me during my driving test. She rear ended me. FML
Today, I wanted to spend the day cleaning my room. My mom thinks that I was lying just to stay home, so she yelled at me to go to her shop. At the shop, she yelled at me for not being any help. When we got home she yelled at me for having a messy room. FML
Today, my little brother told me to give him my phone so he could play a game on it. I said no, because I was taking a call from a friend at the time. He then walked over to the wall, headbutted it, burst into tears, then told my parents that I punched him. They believed him. FML
Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML
Today, my mother and I walked past my boyfriend, whom she's never met. After we casually greeted each other and went on our way, my mother said, "He's cute. Who is he?" I paused for a second and replied, "That's my boyfriend." She then said, "Does he know that?" FML
Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job Mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML
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Top comments
slitherbomb 0
You're supposed to pretend to text people but really just go on Facebook....
gluesniff3r 3
I'm sorry, but pretending to talk to someone is pathetic. Pretend to text like everyone else or just do a thousand other things phones these days offer.
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Comments (47)
slitherbomb 0
You're supposed to pretend to text people but really just go on Facebook....
akayc32 0
Or not be bothered with not having your phone stuck in your face at all times...
xoconnie 8
After so many FMLs about fake talking on the phone, I believe all have us here have learned a valuable lesson.. lol dont do it and just fake text someone! come onnnn man!
TheDeadlyTurtle 7
If ur ever walking alone at night and there's a vehicle full of guys or some shit pretend to talk on the phone it's the best thing ever, no ones going to jump u if they think ur almost home and have an audience.
me_gusta_eso 1
~Forever Alone~
Naitsi 19
forever gone
rallets 23
but who was phone?!?! forever a phone
Jovecove 13
Or just plug in your earphones and listen to some tunes.
Horde 8
YDI for pretending to talk to friends you don't have to impress people you don't care about.
Driveshaft 5
Why? Just...why?
gluesniff3r 3
I'm sorry, but pretending to talk to someone is pathetic. Pretend to text like everyone else or just do a thousand other things phones these days offer.
ItsYourMamaDoe 0
Pretending to text is just as pathetic.
brianjman14 23
What about just sitting there and doing nothing while you're waiting?
kayleigh12 0
What about actually texting or calling someone while you wait? Then you seems less stupid.
bitchslapped22 14
Why is someone so concerned about their self-image in front of complete strangers?
saddgurl 0
Thats boring
kewlkate 9
I pretend to do that when I'm by myself in public and waiting for someone just so less people think to bother me. It works
ItsYourMamaDoe 0
Well, you kind of deserve that one. It's a little bit awkward to pretend to talk on the phone. And fairly obvious to spot out in my opinion
KiddNYC1O 22
Yeah, if the phone rings...
xxkimmyt 9
Why did you even do it? o.o
TashaRuber 0
Lmao ur lucky the fone didnt just start ringing ahahha
TashaRuber 0
Lmaoo just so happens yes
VDubbGrrl 4
Old enough to go to University, old enough to know better.
slappinGoodtimes 0
Old enough to not have mommy pick you up?
VDubbGrrl 4
The only acceptable time to fake talk or text is at the strip club when you are trying to ignore the freaky dancer bugging your group for a lap dance.
Turner_22 0
Strip club?
faithxoxox 1
Girl wants to give lap dance ... Guy refuses? That's a new one. You're at a strip club. You're not exactly there to eat buffalo wings and drink coke.
alycion 39
Not all the girls there are one guy's type. They got to keep an array for everyone. And some of them can be downright annoying.
TashaRuber 0
U just happen to know that, and be the judge right
Bekll 31
This sounds like a regular thing with you or else your mother wouldn't have said that.
TipOfTheHat 10
Mother knows best! She is right, fake talking is pathetic!
FlyingWhisps 5
So many questions... Let's start with: 1. Why the hell did you just decide to pretend to talk to someone on the phone? 2. How did your mom know?
brown4lifejot 1
I think OP person is a loner so she does this quite often.
hobojo69 23
These are both my questions too!