Today, my daughter called for me to come into the bathroom. Turns out the tummy ache she'd been complaining of was actually parasites in her digestive tract. I could swear they were looking at me from the toilet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came down with food poisoning of some sort. After hours of scrambling to the toilet to vomit and empty my bowels, my three-year-old daughter got fed up and is now trying to potty-train me. FML
Today, I had to listen to my daughter’s explosive diarrhea while I watched TV. When she came out of the bathroom, she went white as a sheet. Apparently she thought she was alone. FML
Today, I went to the doctor for horrible stomach pains. He said I had an abnormal amount of stool in me, and that I'd need to flush it out. I called my mom and told her what happened, to which she responded, "I always knew you were full of shit, I didn't need a doctor to tell me that." FML
Today, my five-year-old daughter told me she was going to throw up. I told her to rush to the bathroom. I followed her a few seconds later, only to find her sitting on the toilet and vomiting onto the floor. FML
Today, there was a potluck at my girlfriend's house. I had a sour stomach, so I went to the bathroom to relieve myself. When I flushed, nothing happened. They had to call a plumber to fix the toilet filled with my crap. The whole family watched, noses plugged and faces cringed, looking at me. FML
Today, I got diarrhea while on a trip with my daughters. At our third stop, I had to sit in the stall listening to my 5 year-old informing everyone who came in that "mommy is stopping at EVERY bathroom to poop." FML
Today, my daughter told me her tummy hurt, but I assumed she was lying because she hates visiting grandma. About 20 minutes into the car ride, she got excited and said, "Mum my tummy doesn’t hurt anymore!" About 10 seconds later, the smell filled the car right up to the roof. It was diarrhoea. FML
Today, I was lying in bed with the worst stomach cramps ever. My boyfriend came, looked at me writhing in pain, and said, "Well at least if it's a tapeworm you'll get skinnier." FML
Today, I had some pretty bad stomach pain, so I went to the bathroom. After a few minutes, two girls walked in, taking stalls next to me. That's when my farts began to get very large and explosive. Not only did they break into laughter, they waited for me to come out. FML
Today, I was stuck on the toilet with a huge stomachache after eating bad food the day before. I got up to flush when I noticed that there was a cockroach struggling feebly in the pile of crap. I'll never know if it got there before or after I crapped. FML
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Top comments
FMLandurstoo 9
They're gonna get you! Just like I'm gonna get Chris.
Jarvo_666 6
I chucked up a little..
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Comments (217)
Yemkela 0
OMG, no one here has ever heard of PINWORMS? It's like super common. Gross, but common. I don't know if that's what she had, but still, don't give the mom such a hard time.
Feklfekl2222 32
no pin worms are different she had digestive tract worms there much bigger google them
Yemkela 0
I wonder how the mother knew what area they came from... maybe they went to the doctor later and found out. My point was that people should stop saying OP's a bad mother, whatever parasite it was is not that important in my case...
ThatFatGuyBehind 3
WOW you really need to learn how to make sammiches
KickItHigh 32
Tapeworms? :x
VulpesFidelis 0
I hope she gets better soon; some treatments for complex organisms (parasitic worms, protozoa, etc.) can be extreme, and hard on the patient's body.
SteelCladAngel 0
garlic is pretty good at keeping parasites out of the system after she's been to a doctor and done with ness give her a garlic pill every day.
youngbuck10 9
Go the pharmacy and buy some pinworm medication. Change everyone's bedsheets and make sure everyone in the household take the medication!
mrsekko 0
Done and done. Sterilized EVERYTHING. Vermox for everyone. Sheets/towels washed instantly after use.
e2m2cent 0
ugh was it worms or something.. either way I was eating noodles when I saw this and lost my appetite so thanx for that :(
MerrikBarbarian 9
don't flush them! gross as it sounds you need to collect some to take to the doctor so they can prescribe the right medication.
VulpesFidelis 0
Well, I have a feeling it's a bit late by now. ;o)
mrsekko 0
Lol they let us call this one in... they took our word for it.
hthelittleone 10
ew dont collect them take a picture or something. whatever you do DON'T TOUCH THEM!
triggerit 5
good theme for horror movie...
gramreaper 0
bad mommy!