Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was walking down my street when a girl came up behind me and started yelling about me being a slut. When she saw I was the wrong person, she continued to yell at me because I have blonde hair. FML
Today, I learned that my stalker is still trying to weasel their way into my life even after they doxxed me, cyberstalked me, harassed me, threatened me, and attempted blackmail on me. All this just because I told them that their boyfriend groomed me when I was a minor. FML
Today, a classmate at college accused me of stalking her. All because I walked past her house. I was walking to the supermarket. FML
Today, while I was out shopping, a fairly hideous-looking woman stormed up to me and accused me of ogling her, saying, "As if I'd ever date you!" Less than a minute later, she'd somehow managed to bully me into falsely admitting to it and apologizing. FML
Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of four months. FML
Today, I found out my stalker is my mom's new boyfriend. FML
Today, I got a stern talking-to from the police about threatening and harassing people. Who had called them? None other than my stalker, whom I'd just informed about the restraining order I was filing against him after finding him in my house. For the second time. FML
Today, my stalker - an annoying guy who's dedicated the past three years of his life to stalking me at every turn - somehow got a hold of my number and started texting me at 10pm about how I have no life. FML
Today, I found out that my seemingly innocent 80-something neighbor has been stalking every girl in the neighborhood, and considers me his girlfriend. FML
Today, on my way to work, I was checking my hair in the semi-reflective window of an office building. I suddenly realized that the guy I had a one-night stand with last week was standing on the other side, looking confused. He now genuinely believes that I am stalking him. FML
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Top comments
perdix 31
Looks like she's done her homework! If you do have to have a stalker, you certainly don't want a lazy one. If mine don't get their facts straight, I close my bliñds when I shower.
x_Cupcakes 0
Good luck!
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Comments (119)
extremenoodles 0
Heh, my Year 9 dance partner had to be told that the floor was covered in ants in order to do the cha-cha. Oh, high school...
ramirezlmt 0
lol yeah I'm confused too. Dance partner from childhood or ....now? Wait! The mom should be begging you to make that boy straight. Or she's afraid you'll take her momma's boy?
marinus_fml 20
Australia is fuckall like America.
SmallTownCutie 0
haha I would love to see that!
Anteezy 7
I'm embarrassed :$
rattusrattus 19
I'm wondering how this woman retained her boyfriend. Guys like 'endearingly crazy', not 'Edward Cullen psycopath jealous crazy'. Similar things can be said about women.
roeallen 11
I think that is the goal in mind. Everyone can get a stalker, but how many people have their own physco killer? Huh? Not many.
6969awesome 0
**** you, Australia is nothing like America America is a peice of shit
CrabCaviar 0
become best friends
rickolette 0
yeah, America kinda is, but I have always felt like u could do whatever the hell u wanted in both contries.
officechairsoldi 0
3=win