Today, I was going on a dinner date with a girl I had just met. After I picked her up I asked her if she would like to get lobster. She looked at me and asked if those were the red ones. Confused I nodded. She replied, "Sorry, I don't eat red meat." I laughed. She was serious. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took my date to a restaurant but I had no idea how picky of an eater she is. Our waiter had to practically use 3 pages in his notebook just to write down all her special requests for this single meal. By the end, I could see he really wanted to ask if she was being serious or taking the piss. FML
Today, I was on a blind date with a girl my friend set me up with. We went to a fancy restaurant and she ordered the shrimp. I told her, "I'm allergic to shrimp, so you shouldn't order it in case I want to kiss you later." She looked at the waiter and said, "I'll have the shrimp." FML
Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm a vegan. She replied, "So, you're allergic to meat?" FML
Today, I went on a date with a fun, attractive girl. She ordered off the kid's menu, drowned her food in ketchup, and said my burger with blue cheese and bacon was disgusting. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to a vegetarian-friendly restaurant. She ordered shrimp fettuccine, and I asked why. She slowly explained to me that vegetarians can eat shrimp, then muttered that she now knows who has the brains in our relationship. FML
Today, I went on my first date in 8 years. While we were looking at the menu, the guy said: "So if you're vegetarian, why're you so fat?" FML
Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML
Today, I went on my first date with a girl I have been infatuated with for months. At the restaurant, the waiter came while she was in the bathroom. I ordered steaks for both of us. Turns out, she is vegetarian, and doesn't like it when men are "overly aggressive." She called me a cow murderer. FML
Today, I went on a blind date with a guy at a seafood restaurant. I explained to him that I am deathly allergic to shrimp. When the waiter took my order, he interrupted me and said, “She’ll have the shrimp," while looking me dead in the eye. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out for lunch, and I asked her if I could have a bite of her meal. She took it to mean I was calling her fat, and stormed out. FML
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Top comments
weinerdog 2
Well, I'd say it's an fml because the dude apparently can't find any dates that are smarter than a box of rocks.
Demon_fml 0
More like FHL!!! Was she blonde?
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Comments (171)
kidneedsalife 0
ahahahaha moron
Uconnrunner 0
you should keep going out with her as a joke and just **** with her head until you get bored and tell her you are looking for someone that isn't as smart as her, and then call her retarded just to confuse her.
mk893 0
haha #2 i was gonna ask the same thing.
chelsizzle 0
um, do you switch genders or something?
BobSwarley 4
not all are red... some are blue google that shit
lil_ham1644 29
There's also black, orange, white, purple, & many combinations of the aforementioned colors.
free_Aus 0
Two step approach. 1. f#@k 2. Chuck
sLap_fml 0
hahaha that is actually hilarious.. poor girl.
amoureaux 0
hahah. but i don't get what being blonde has to do with it.
crazykidd15 0
O__o. obviously a blonde
Aristai 0
Not really an FML... But you should put it on notalwaysright.
chasem_fml 0
dump asap, she'll claim she doesn't eat red meat when you try to slip it in her mouth too