Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I saw my car being broken into on the street below my apartment. Too scared to stop them myself, I called the police. Before I could even tell them what was going on, they put me on hold. It was a good 5 minutes before I realized they'd hung up on me. FML
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Today, the police called because someone had turned in my wallet that was stolen. I happily drove home only to find that my house had been robbed and ransacked. FML
Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML
Today, the police came to my door and told me about a woman who called the cops on me because she said that I had been following her in my car. We were on the highway. FML
Today, I ran into the woman who hit my car and drove off three days ago. She was my bank teller. I called 911; she pressed the silent alarm. Guess whose story the cops believed. FML
Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
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Top comments
OneandOnlyOne 0
Glad they caught you!!! Some dumb idiot did that to my car. TWO THOUSAND dollars worth of damage. Wish I could catch them!!! Hope you get fined too!!!
MustangBaby 0
You shouldn't have fled.
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Comments (135)
astriofou 0
dont worry op live and learn. a little bump and run doesnt mean ur a bad person. just tht u need to make the right choice.. just dont do it again
jonnyBgoode 9
People comment with the dumbest shit...
DevilsMetsGiants 30
That's why you never admit to anything before you're accused
MeganDalek 12
I've had someone hit my car in my work parking lot. You do know that even if you just drive away most places have cameras...
kelseythompson 27
sometimes I read shit like this and think what a ******* idiot
SwimmerBoy16 15
Cops don't come to your house bitching about you hitting a parked car trying to arrest you..
MrVegas32 3
Deny, deny, deny... When they show you proof deny some more... Never admit when your wrong lmfao
NostalgiaFreak9 43
Good thing you got caught. You definitely deserved that.
NostalgiaFreak9 43
My bad, I mean I'm glad you were stupid enough to confess.