Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I took the bus after work. When I got to the remote parking lot, I realized my car had been stolen so I called the police to report it. When they came to take a statement and asked me when was the last time I saw my car was, I replied, “This morning, when I drove it to wo… Oh.” FML
Today, during my work shift, my car got stolen and I had to walk home on the rain. While I was walking home, my stolen car drove by. FML
Today, I couldn't find my car in a mall parking lot. After 30 minutes of searching, I reported it stolen to the mall security. It turns out that I'd parked it on the opposite side of the mall. Security escorted me to my car, all while giving me pitiful looks. FML
Today, I finished my shopping at Costco, and realized I'd forgotten where I had parked. After scouring the parking lot for 20 minutes, I called the police and filed a report for a stolen vehicle. I then remembered I had bought a new car yesterday and parked it right next to the entrance. FML
Today, I took the bus home after visiting a friend. Standing in front of my house, I realized that I had forgotten my keys. They were still in my car, which I had parked at my friend's place and forgotten. FML
Today, I went to retrieve my stolen wallet from a train station. After I collected it, I returned to the place where I'd parked my bike, only to find that my bike had been stolen. FML
Today, I bundled up to shovel my car out of almost 2 feet of snow, only to find my car was gone. I ran into the nearby police station to report my stolen car. The policeman trudged down with me to get a report. I had parked my car on the other side of the street. FML
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML
Today, I thought my car had been stolen because I couldn’t for the life of me find it in the office car park. I panicked and called the cops, only to remember I had taken my bike to work. FML
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Top comments
patd77 12
Dumbass
spatula232 25
'The bastards left it outside the school, it's all good, I've got it now'
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Comments (103)
patd77 12
Dumbass
Jreslier 15
You look like you're about to shed a tear in your profile picture.
Lebeaugars95 20
you look like your neck's broken in yours #24
Jreslier 15
#29 You look like a good swimmer.
valalvax 13
You look like you don't like water much
ohmandapants 17
Yes, let's resort to racist stereotypes! That's always good.
MichellinMan 20
Yea, usually "dumbass" isn't necessary, but OP, you were being a dumbass.
EvilTurtle 35
If my car was stolen‚ I'd do those thing as well. What I don't understand is how you could've forgotten about it.
noah_1234 24
op, do a follow please so you can explain how on earth something so valuable got "stolen":)
foxwasalamb 24
how could you forget your car? if yout car was at school, how did you get home? wouldnt that have prompted you to remember where your car was?
TheNewGuy03 29
This is a perfect response. This is self-uppercut-worthy. I honestly can't think of how this could have happened other than OP being mentally inept.
gwho 3
it happens.
stevothedevo 25
#1 is that you Red?
MehrunesDagon456 20
No, this is Patrick.
sawapee 21
That's a bit dumb...
spatula232 25
'The bastards left it outside the school, it's all good, I've got it now'
CoGhostRider 31
Exactly what I would say after going through all of that
cypherwars 15
I bet that's what OP did :D
nh97103 9
Yeah, except then cameras will no doubt be checked.
IloveToLaugh143 21
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
If I had a car, I'd probably make that mistake too. I'm glad it wasn't actually stolen though!
slingerslasher 24
What if I were to tell you that remembering where your car is actually isn't hard?
rocker_chick23 27
How hard is it to remember where you parked your car?
noah_1234 24
it's your means of transportation, not something you carry around...
BBlah 26
I don't mean to sound like a bitch when I ask this, but how in the hell do you forget something like that?
ShowMeKay 20
Don't think you sound like one at all :) That's exactly what I was thinking - before calling all these people, you'd think OP would have at least retraced when they saw their car the last time.
baseballbv 17
Or remember where they left their CAR. I don't understand how one forgets that. It's not a bag of chips or a sock.
dragonkisses28 25
Have you ever come out of a store and forgotten where you parked? I've done it several times. If you have other things on your mind, it's really quite easy to forget. Every summer you hear about parents who forgot their kid was in the back seat. You wonder how someone could forget something so important. Preoccupied people with too much on their plate.
Lil_Red777 21
Those are terrible excuses to use, and no matter how preoccupied I am I don't forget my kid.
slyde32 12
I forget where I park all the time, but I know the place it's at, just not what section of the car park, I'm not about to forget after a few hours that I forgot I took my car to the shops and ring the police saying someone stole it
brand125 17
47 - forgetting where exactly you parked in a specific parking lot is a lot differnt from forgetting where on earth it is located..
crimsin_ 21
I'm thinking there was a little alcohol involved...
winterkills 7
dude. where's my car? there was an entire movie about this.
elusiveshame 22
Comparing a car to a child is a horrible analogy. Sure, it's easy to forget where you parked (it happens to everyone, especially of you drive a small car being blocked by a giant truck/SUV), but forgetting a kid is ridiculous. There's no excuse for that, ever.
NightKat 25
It's ok OP I've done that too. My friends never let me live it down.
Noremac42 8
"Dude, where's my car?"
lishabear 21
"Where's your car, dude?"
CoGhostRider 31
What's mine say?!
DomiLove 26
And then....
MrDonSalvetti 27
Well, to say this as polite as possible: That wasn't a smart move Dory!
buckdharma 38
I have a feeling op's car isn't much.
thewife5 19
Why? That could never happen to him if he had a nice car... Makes sense.
Zwingend 15
Did you happen to have woken up with the words "DUDE" and/or "SWEET" tattoed on your body this morning?