Today, my boyfriend asked me if I have ever or would ever fake an orgasm. I assured him that I wouldn't, when he has actually never given me one. I didn't have the heart to tell him. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried faking an orgasm for the first time, because I thought it would be sexy for my boyfriend. He stopped to ask me if I was okay. I guess I'm not good at faking it. FML
Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML
Today, after faking my orgasms for several years, I found out that my boyfriend has been telling his friends that I'm super loose because he doesn't feel anything when I'm cumming. FML
Today, my girlfriend of over a year said she has been faking her orgasms since the first time we've had sex. FML
Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML
Today, my girlfriend of 11 months told me that she's been faking her orgasms the whole time. Just to make me "proud" of myself. FML
Today, the quality of my sex life reached a new low. I faked my orgasm. And so did he. FML
Today, I was telling my boyfriend I had fake orgasms all the time to piss him off. He replied, "That's OK, I'm f***ing three other girls." FML
Today, I let my boyfriend finger me for the first time. Today, I also learned, after fifteen very, very long minutes of it, how to fake an orgasm. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML
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Top comments
codgod93 0
well that's just too bad. man up and tell him so he can maybe work on giving you one!
perdix 31
That is a question no man should ever ask -- there is only one answer that will always be given. As far as we are concerned, it doesn't matter to us whether your orgasms are real or not, they are just signals that we are doing it right. If you are faking, you are just screwing yourself (figuratively) because you are letting him get away with inadequate performance. If you lay there quietly as he pumps away, he might get the hint that he has work to do down there with his fingers and his tongue.
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Comments (171)
DuckFlu 0
this isn't really an fml you know...
roverboy1337 0
great, now you'll never get one. why?
kombucha_fml 8
i'm sorry but you deserve it, as you should talk to him and tell him what turns you on.
EvilDave 13
Yet another fine example of how wonderfully women communicate.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#88 Not all women are like OP. You do realize that, right?
5t3ff1k4h 45
Well, Nerds, you said it a lot tamer than I would have.
nerdsgetmehot 23
Bahaha. Believe me, I had to try pretty hard to restrain myself. :P
Freeze_fml 17
FYL for having a communication disability.
miasanmia 0
**** HIS life
schalk 12
It's usually pretty obvious if a woman does have one. OP, you need to coach your man. Maybe try some different positions, just not that one where you put your ankles on his shoulders.
joa76 3
Wait, why not? I mean, sure, that can hurt the first couple times you try it because he can go a lot deeper, but it feels AMAZING, and is absolutely perfect for hitting your G-spot.
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
It's a ref to a recent FML. The OP thought she'd peed herself in that position. There was some debate in the comments about whether it was piss or female ejaculate, though.
cardin_06 3
Well now you can't get mad if he doesn't give it to you right
mattmag 0
If he's asking, he already knew the answer. You just made it worse.
Crysta_fml 3
Or you could've just told him, and you both could've worked on making the sex more enjoyable. But since you aren't mature enough to discuss what you'd rather he'd do in bed, or what he's doing wrong, YDI and enjoy the bad sex.