Today, my husband pooped the bed for the second time since we've been married. We've been married a month. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my husband and I got married. The only thing that is different so far is that he now thinks that it's okay to shit with the door open. FML
Just once
Today, at last, my husband instigated sex for the first time since the honeymoon a few months ago when he started fondling me in bed. Then I realised he was asleep. FML
Today, my husband threw up on me during our wedding vows. FML
The language of love
Today, my husband asked me to spoon him. He used it as an excuse to start farting on me. Yep, this is my husband. FML
Relationship goals
Today, my husband missed the toilet again. I would have been less disgusted if he'd peed this time. FML
Today, my husband told me yet again that the last two years have been the worst of his life. Our two year anniversary is next week. FML
Wait for the hangover
Today, my husband came home late from drinking with his buddies, only to toss and turn and keep me up for an hour. He then sat up and didn't move for a few minutes. I sat up to see what was wrong, only to see him pissing on the carpet beside our bed. FML
Today, I slept in my boyfriend's room for the first time. I also wet the bed for the first time in a decade. FML
Today, I found my husband farting on my pillows, bare ass. His only words were, "This isn't what it looks like." FML
Today, I found out the hard way that my boyfriend occasionally wets the bed. He's 25 and we're moving in together next month. FML
Top comments
Metalman69 0
and you didnt know he had this problem prior to marrying him? did you two not live together before then?
vicki2354 0
omg potty train that man!!!
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Comments (154)
Metalman69 0
and you didnt know he had this problem prior to marrying him? did you two not live together before then?
BananaSticker 0
That's more of an fml on his part than yours. He must be SO embarrassed and ashamed. And his WIFE posting an FML about sure wouldn't help. I think maybe you should be more supportive and see if there might be something wrong with him or some way to prevent it from happening again instead of acting like YOUR life is ******. >.>
Smeagol648 0
GET HIM A DIAPER! :D
stephanie0613 0
That is disgusting.
debbiess 0
metalman69: Not everybody lives together before getting married. There's still some conservative people out there. OP might or might not be part of those few. Just saying : )
EnvyMe33 26
I lived at home until I got married.
TechnoTaco 0
Everyone just assumes the wife's life is ****** and the husband's is just dandy. There could be a medical issue BEHIND this, lol. (Couldn't resist) But seriously, get that checked out.
Mr_Zachary 0
14 (bananasticker) is the husband? huhuhu
ssch 0
yeah, whenever he sees your breast he gets explosive diarrhea
BananaSticker 0
OMG! 49 how did you know?
Mr_Zachary 0
i'm epic.
RedPillSucks 33
Damn. This is a good argument for living together before marriage. Try the milk before you buy the cow... (Let the conservative vs liberal bashing commence..... This can only be resolved *deep booming voice* by Mortal Kombat!)
T_Shadows 0
OH mAI GAWD!!!! BANANA STICKER!!!!
zerobahamut03 2
Someone needs depends!
missmontreal97 4
bananasticker just made a very good point !
Jennifra 0
Who buys a cow? :P
77taylah33 0
i totally agree with #14 he is your husband and you should support him and it would be embrassing for him probably
skittle68 0
Medical condition or not, that's still disgusting. F both their lives. ugh
theian01 3
*ahem* Shit happens. HAHAHAHAHAHAZZZ!!! Iz B SoOoOo FUNNEHZZZ!!!!!1!1!1!!!1!1!2!
pandalovesreggae 0
wtheeeeefuck
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
Damn you, RPS! *shakes fist* Some Mortal Combat knowledge would really come in handy right now.
sc95060sc 0
ydi for getting married at the age of 4 :D
tweetbaby14 18
1 not everyone lives with their future spouse before marriage. some families even forbid such a thing... like mine. OP is probably in a family with a few beliefs similar to mine.
fishertruck 0
I agree with you.People need to live together before marriage because life is very different when a couple lives under one roof for the first time.It often can make or break a relationship.And where's the fun if your not living together until marriage.
NatDancer2010 0
I smell an upcoming divorce..
KCTruth4 0
Men have periods 2
Person000 0
13 it's always sunny in philadelphia the best most under appreciated show in history.
st0815 9
@tweetbaby14 - some people live together before marriage, some don't. Personally I think the latter is the more risky approach, but that's just me - everybody needs to evaluate that for themselves. Having said that: it's your life, your family doesn't get to make that decision for you - you need to take charge of your own happiness.
KRYPTON1T3 5
17 exactly and why would a grown man shit the bed?
TShaunik 12
You don't need to live together before you marry. In fact, couples who live together before marriage are 88% more likely to get divorced. No thank you. I'll wait until we're married before I move in together.
Lichinamo 33
@17 That would be very embarassing on the husband's part.
Lichinamo 33
@117 You must be feeling brilliant for thinking that one up. And your horrid grammar, capitalization, and punctuation combined repels me almost as much as a man who poops himself in his sleep. Although I do not blame the husband.
lectricpharaoh 9
#14, why should SHE be the one to have to try to fix the problem? It's him that's been ******** the bed, not her, so maybe HE should see a doctor/buy some adult diapers/etc. The fact that it seems he hasn't cared to address the issue before now speaks volumes, as does his failure to disclose his 'problem' before the marriage.
Asstastic4 0
That's disgusting. FYL indeed.
trueblue42 4
you married a retard
vicki2354 0
omg potty train that man!!!
debbiess 0
lol yeah
jakii_ 0
make him watch that Sesame Street video that little girl watched in the other FML
hemz_fml 13
How come you never noticed this before?
aspnet_rules 0
Have you asked him if he has a diaper fetish, or enjoys infantilism? He could be DL.
diegomanguelo 5
omg that would be sick
dtbomb 3
I didn't know that was possible
SmallTownCutie 0
your profile picture is amazing.
Phustercluck 11
It depends... Ba dum tish
evlive 0
same xD
Mirorbo 27
Okay....seriously...how does one actually shit themselves in bed unless they are an infant? If he has very relaxed muscles or something, that's one thing, but he would actually be aware of such a thing and thus would have taken extra precautions. This is one FML that has seriously boggled my brain with the sensation of WTF?
Phustercluck 11
Isn't it called a wabbit?
TheIrishJaneDoe 9
I can think of two possibilities off the top of my head: 1) Too much alcohol. Passing out can lead to losing bowel/bladder control, and 2) An undiagnosed back injury. If he's got back or leg pain, OP, get him to the hospital ASAP. Loss of control is a symptom of a severely pinched nerve, similar to an erection immediately after an injury. Without treatment, permanent, disabling damage is possible.
legit12345 0
o
primadonna9396 16
My brother in law ***** himself at work all the time because he is constantly drinking and only eats something solid every 3-4 days.
EnvyMe33 26
Must be a medical problem or drunk or on drugs...
mrahhhhh 21
Your husband has either one digit or three in his age. Jokes aside, if you didn't know about it, he probably didn't want you to dislike him for that. Be supportive OP, he may have a medical condition.
Lichinamo 33
I agree. I would support him, but insit that he either wears diapers/pull-ups to bed, or have to separate beds in the same room.
FFML_314 12
Piss in his sock drawer.
philly1128 0
I HATE YOU SOOO MUCH
thatonename 7
A-*******-greed.
FFML_314 12
Boo hoo. Carry on, kiddos.
aardvarkish 17
I think 8 is funny. I also think whimpering over it is stupid funny.
SAMHAlN 0
hey look Shawn white
LullabyeLove 0
agreed.
Atomicsoap 0
I thought it was "popped" in bed when I read it the first time. I read the comments, and learned that the situation was poop. Gross.
Jimboom 12
Thats what you get for skipping a step in the relationship guide. It goes 1. Get to know the person, date, fall in love etc.. (important to find out if you are compatible) 2. Move in together and live together for a little while (learn any annoying traits they may previously have been hiding during the step 1 and subsequently learn if said traits are dealbreakers or not) 3. Get married and live happily ever after.
Mirorbo 27
4. ??? 5. PROFIT!
Jimboom 12
Lol. Exactly! :-P
ktbird 0
Agreed
theian01 3
You forgot to collect underwear!
pdp_fml 21
Even living together before marriage, will not guarantee a good marriage. I however agree that getting to know someone prior to getting married is best.
Baytheshark 14
Some people don't believe in moving in before they get married... Now what?
EnvyMe33 26
Technically you aren't supposed to live together until after you get married.