Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML
Today, as I was working at my babysitting job, I was watching a 3.5 year old girl. She begged and begged me to come in the jacuzzi with her, and when I put on my 2-piece bathing suit on, the young girl asked me why my stomach looked like a bagel. I looked down just to realize she was right. FML
Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML
Today, while tucking my toddler in bed and telling her I love her, she responded with, "And I love your bouncy castle belly!" I know I'm overweight, but I didn't think I was that fat. FML
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML
Today, my youngest son's teacher surprised me with a box of diapers. Apparently my son told her I was pregnant, but I'm not. I had to explain to her I'm just fat. She apologized and felt awful, and told me to keep the diapers. My children are 5 and 7. FML
Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML
Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Today, I was babysitting a really annoying kid who wouldn't listen to me, and threw his food through the kitchen, so I punished him. When his mother came home he ran to her and said, "Mommy, mommy, it's not true what you told me, fat people are NOT nice!" FML
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Top comments
iAmScrubs 19
Tell the toddler you are Santa. You will get sooo much respect.
indianajones103 2
eat the child. problem solved.
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Comments (117)
fromthesuck 8
it's funny how there's such a sensitivity about the body. yet way back when if you were fat it was because you were lazy and ate too much. now there's so many excuses. look yes there is something you can do about it. if you have an imbalance that makes you depressed it has been the result if many studies that the chemicals produced by excersize can improve that imbalance. the only excuse I've seen that I actually believe are those hard core medications some people have to take that makes them gain faster than they can work off
mnlk 0
lose weight.
pinklady72191 4
Look up "affordableHCGdiet" on Facebook. it's a strict diet, but if you stick to it, you can lose around a lb a day. that's what I've been doing. I've lost 10 lbs in a few weeks...I did cheat some, but if I had actually followed it, I would be at my goal weight by now. or you can go to their website...just Google it. you can change if you really want to.
TheWicked 4
Well you've got no one else but yourself to blame for being fat.
AirForce48 2
Wake up call
DisappearingRose 18
Should've just said that's how big god made your belly.
SumGayGai 0
put down the fork
KzlovesYewx101 5
don't worry about it. Young kids never understand anything and they can be really rude.
ILoveTabz 0
ouch!
XxGuard 0
The kid is 3, they wont remember.
irish_unity 0
#82 - maybe the kid will but the OP won't.
XxGuard 0
yeah.... what's your point? She will forget at one point... better or worse things most likely will happen in her future where she will simply forget.