Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Be warned
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Some girls are bigger than others
Today, while taking the subway home, a woman offered me her seat. I smiled and declined. She said she insisted because of my "pregnancy." I was too ashamed to say I wasn't pregnant, so I just took the seat. FML
Today, even though I'm overweight, I was feeling alright about the way I looked in the historical costume I'm required to wear by my job. A little kid came in and asked me if I was having a baby. Guess I don't look as good as I thought. FML
It's a pillow soft for my neck
Today, while tucking my toddler in bed and telling her I love her, she responded with, "And I love your bouncy castle belly!" I know I'm overweight, but I didn't think I was that fat. FML
Today, I dragged my son along with me to a work party because I didn't want him home by himself. Halfway through, he stood up and made an announcement about my pregnancy. I had to explain to all my coworkers and my boss that I'm not pregnant, I'm just fat. FML
Today, someone asked when my baby was due. I'm not pregnant, but I was so embarrassed to be mistaken for a pregnant lady that I rubbed my tummy and said "December." FML
Today, I was so ashamed of my weight when I sat down and the suction of my thighs made a loud fart noise, I admitted to it being a fart rather than my fat rolls. FML
Belly bounce!
Today, a customer greeted me with, "So! When's the baby coming!?" I'm NOT pregnant. I just gain weight in my guts. FML
Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML
Top comments
JackeeDawn 9
There are only two kinds of real honest people in this world; small children and drunk people.
jackassiddy 8
But isn't that where most people keep their fat? :o
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Comments (139)
JackeeDawn 9
There are only two kinds of real honest people in this world; small children and drunk people.
icrest80 4
Don't forget the government! Wait a sec nvm....
theslimshadylp 6
Children are brutally honest.
evilplatypus 39
What about autistic people? That's one of the signs of autism.
Psych101 9
32- You shouldn't be getting thumbed down, that's actually the truth. I know someone with a mild form of autism and he is often brutally honest.
evilplatypus 39
I have HFA myself. That's why I said it. Apparently it isn't PC to say things that are true.
imavelociraptor 6
Well if it's the truth then why should he be thumbed down???
fylx100 19
65- Because people are ignorant and if they read something that they don't believe is true, they tend to thumb the comment down rather than looking it up.
Gremlinswife 13
33-Not even close. That's a gross generalization.
evilplatypus 39
67 - Everything is a generalization to some extent. I doubt there's much of anything in this world that doesn't have an exception. That being said, as an HFA person who teaches special education (and studied special education in the US, France and England), I can tell you from experience and research, that the vast majority of people with autism (who do not have nonverbal autism) are painfully honest and blunt unless they have undergone significant social etiquette education.
buck33 14
67 - It's not a generalization. 33 said it is a SIGN of autism. It would be a generalization if 33 had said autistic people are always brutally honest.
CSweeney 2
I heard that people talking in their sleep are honest xD
Gremlinswife 13
As a mother to a child with autism I do know a bit on the topic. I guess I just don't like when people generalize or expect everyone to be like rain man? Haha. Everyone with autism is different. Just like all us neuro typical people :) I should have elaborated on my earlier comment.
charlieisawesome 4
Ooh yeah that would be me haha
laden_swallow09 35
65- Some posts here on FML don't get the thumbs they deserve until a few hours later, sometimes 24 hours later. As you can see, it's in the black, now. :)
DogsPaw 16
Shouldn't be ashamed of how you look. It's what's on the inside that counts. :)
jackassiddy 8
But isn't that where most people keep their fat? :o
rsunshine2020 13
You should love yourself and the way you look, and if you don't, go work out.
frokeyman92 9
Right, so I should go get fat. Always accept who you are, but try to improve yourself and make yourself better in whatever way you see fit.
zuzupetalsYO 11
2-On the inside there is a fake baby.
77777771 12
24: That was honestly the funniest comment ever. Thumbs up for you!
kakarot2 11
Unless you are sick.. There is no excuse to being fat. " accept your self the way you are" Is what fat people tell themselves in order to continue their fat lazy life style. Everyone should be striving to look healthy.(NOTICE I said healthy.. Not skeletal). Being fat is NOT ok by any means.
kakarot2 11
Like you said. It's a lack of impulse control. If you took the time to read my comment I said I didn't mean be skeletal, I mean be healthy. If you are fat and not sick, it's your own damn fault for being lazy and CHOOSING not to eat healthy and exercise.
theluckyones 10
I agree with Kakarot2 Being fat is a life choice. Like Ricky Gervais (comedian)says: "fat people don't get fat behind their own backs..they know why they're fat &they like it."
kakarot2 11
^ did I not just say " if you are not sick" Although genetics play an important role, they DO NOT make you fat. People make themselves fat. Genetics just make it easier.
laden_swallow09 35
115- Uhh, yeah. It IS just that easy. That's the way it's been done for literally thousands of years. You're only enabling the obesity epidemic. Half of the health problems you mentioned arise BECAUSE of excess weight. Seriously, think about it.
Batterypost 23
Well, #129, the thing is that no one does that, unless they have severe thyroid problems. Either you are losing fat but building muscle (which happens to be heavier than fat), or you are counting your calories wrong. For example people tend to forget that Coca-Cola and Salad-Dressing is really packed with calories. There is no magic when it comes to being healthy. Saying that this comes from "skinny people with no clue" is just trying to make excuses. I'm not super-skinny, and the only reason I'm at a "normal" weight is because I watch what I eat.
ali094king 4
I think people are being bias. Having extra fat isn't going to kill you and actually geography/weather conditions play important roles in our weight. Being obese isn't healthy obviously but because the OP has a belly doesn't mean she's a fat ass.
Cinderelli 8
What does OP mean?
icrest80 4
Before your comment gets buried it means original poster
JackeeDawn 9
Or old pal :)
ThePsyche 9
Or other person?
expertsmilee 26
Ostrich pussy
theslimshadylp 6
Original prankster.
Pelvispresley 8
Ornate picalos
AlexBblah 10
Orale puto?
perdix 31
The OP means that she has a protruding belly and the small child asked if a developing fetus was the cause of the bulbous abdomen, but the true cause was excessive adipose tissue (aka, fat.) Does that answer your question?
sens3sfailing 25
Ocelot panda
sens3sfailing 25
No, they meant what does the term "OP" mean. You did not answer their question.
MsFML_ 16
Maybe you are having a baby, you just don't know it. (:
bestnameright 14
Lol I love how you pose this as a good thing :)
TheMathMajor 26
It could be a good thing.
nevershoutkendal_fml 11
The "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" crew can start filming!
ThePsyche 9
Awww I'm sorry op!:( children say the darnedest things sometimes, and I'm sure he didn't mean it. You shouldn't be too upset, a lot of guys find women with some meat on their bones very attractive. Just rock it girl. :)
theluckyones 10
Kids have no filters. I've had my hair very short and I'm now letting it grow out, when I go to resteraunts kids question if I'm a boy or girl cause theyre confused on the fact that my hair is short but I also have boobs..
Zaros_fml 24
6- There is a difference between "meat on your bones" and wing mistaken for pregnant, even by a child.
Legendoflaw 4
#42 if that's you in your profile picture. I really don't see how anyone can mistake you for a male. Short hair or not.
theluckyones 10
Yea that's me in the pic,but I guess from the back of my head I look like a boy:/
charlieisawesome 4
Buuuut you would have to face them to be able to hear them ask if you are a boy or a girl & therefore seeing the red lipstick and makeup and shaped eyebrows it probably would be SAFE to assume that your a girl ... Hmmm. Maybe I'm reading into things. Anywhoo
theluckyones 10
Silly, you don't have to face someone to hear them. And they were kids and were pretty loud. You are definitely reading into this a little too much. Just saying that kids don't have filters and ask what others don't.
A_Hernandez90 2
biggie biggie biggie can't u see? sometimes ur looks just hypnotize me... haha gotta love lil kids...
un1corns 15
7 - What the hell does that song have to do with this FML?
funkiemonkey15 4
Try losing weight
TourettesGuyFTW 26
Why is this being thumbed down?! Is is bad advice?
NMSO851 3
Well it could be maybe because we don't know what she looks like. Could be a small tummy or a big one. Can t judge the size of someones body off a post
Welshite 40
Never be ashamed of yourself OP. Accept who you are.
PamChopsWithMint 5
And if you can't accept yourself, then make changes.
LittleGreenPaola 23
If you don't feel comfortable with your body, get in shape. it only depends on your will power.
ihasbrains 10
It's true. Exercise boosts self-esteem and is a natural stress reliever.
kimg0885 23
Maybe you could be on that show, I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant!?
Redekai 0
Or biggest loser?....
jizzwold 21
Or whale wars.
PipingMouse 14
Most likely, Extreme Makeover: Weight Loss Edition.
jizzwold 21
glad i could save your day