Today, I was sitting on the couch with my 5 year-old on my lap. All of a sudden, she turned to me and said, "Daddy, I love your boobies. They're a good pillow." My own kid just called me fat. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my 5 year-old daughter saw me getting ready to sit down in a fold-out camp chair, and told me, with a big smile on her face, "Daddy, you're too fat to sit in that chair. You'll break it with your big butt." Out of the mouths of babes, I guess. FML
Today, while tucking my toddler in bed and telling her I love her, she responded with, "And I love your bouncy castle belly!" I know I'm overweight, but I didn't think I was that fat. FML
Today, my 4 year old daughter walked in while I was changing my shirt. She said "When I get older I am going to have big boobies just like you." I'm her dad. FML
Today, my 3-year-old daughter told me I was blocking her view of her puppy. She said, "Dad, your boobs are too long!" FML
Today, I was hanging out at a friend's house. Her adorable 5 year-old sister came up, gave me a hug, and said, "You're fat. When are you going home?" FML
Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML
Today, I got out of the shower and my 3 year old sister comes into the bathroom and says "I want big boobies like yours when I grow up." And from the other room I hear my dad go "Sweetie, you've already got bigger boobs than your sister." FML
Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML
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Top comments
FerrariCake 2
Kids call it like they see it. If you want someone to lie to you, ask an adult.
hXcsoccerplaya 0
well you are buddy. hit the gym.
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Comments (84)
hXcsoccerplaya 0
well you are buddy. hit the gym.
Reyo 2
^This Besides, you're done. You've reproduced. You've succeeded in mucking err...contributing to the gene pool. Plus, my Dad isn't a glorious peice of manhunk who still swoons the ladies. It's not like it's just you.
ilovefatcats 12
lol moobs man boobs! XD
FerrariCake 2
Kids call it like they see it. If you want someone to lie to you, ask an adult.
kukopia 0
Better make that: ask an adult who relies on you for wages or tips.
zays 0
And I don't think your daughter realized only mommies have "boobies".
waterynuggets 0
Men have breasts, too. Due to hormones, they just don't grow the same ya know lol
kukopia 0
Because you don't realize that fat daddies have boobies, ya ignorant douche.
noelykins1 19
Well technically everyone has boobies. Men and woman have breast but woman contain more tissue and produce milk. Also both men and women can get breast cancer by the way.
smiggs 0
Well you might want to lose weight before she starts saying that in public.
baby_gurl2405 0
well maybe thats a hint that you need to work out and lose some weight
boatkicker 5
That's actually sorta adorable...... But if it really bugs you I'm sure there's some sort of exercise plan or diet you can try. Whatever floats your boat. :)
marymarymaryyy 0
I think that's really sweet. It was a compliment. Kids love it when their parents are "comfortable". haha :D well, like already said, just work out a bit and it'll be alright. :)
Person1233 13
No one pities a man who can't control his McDonalds intake.
blakehilli8 0
ydi for not watching your weight . throw up what you eat from now on
npk88 0
That's what you have to love about kids, they speak the truth! Try and lose some wight so maybe you don't have health problems or a heart attack and can be around while she grows up! I almost always click YDI for those "oh no I'm fat" fml's....come on, you know you are fat and the only person who can fix it is you!
hbgoddard 0
YOU WIN #9
mj2123 0
Yeah, the problem with this is that: 1. The causational effect of overweight/obesity on health is tenuous at best; 2. Actually, no, plenty of people who are not fat get called fat because our culture is completely ****** up when it comes to weight; and, 3. Even people who are medically overweight or obese may not be able to lose weight without resorting to unhealthy measures (overexercising and/or starvation). Not everyone is genetically or biologically meant to weigh within the healthy weight range based on BMI. And, of course, enlarged breasts (gynecomastia) can occur in men who aren't fat. It's usually caused by hormones.
Loveya448 0
Well, then get out and do something about it!