Today, my shoe fell apart a few minutes after I got to work. I called my boyfriend and asked him to bring me the "pretty black pair" in my closet. What did he bring? Black stilettos. I'm a waitress with an eight-hour shift. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I wore a new pair of shoes to work. By lunchtime, my feet were covered in blisters and I had to limp my way through the rest of the day. FML
Today, after 7 hours on my feet at work, my boyfriend picked me up. Relieved, I took off my shoes. Suddenly, he looked up and sniffed, asking, "Is that your feet?" I'd forgotten to put on socks in my rush to work. He made me put my shoes back on and sit in the back, windows open. FML
Today, I went on the first date I've been on in years. While walking into the movie theatre, one of my shoes broke. Then I remembered that I needed to grab my mask. While walking back to the car, my other shoe broke. After the movie, I tripped on my broken shoes, and brought him down with me. FML
Today, my girlfriend was in the back seat of a car with one of my friends when she got sick and puked all over one of his dress shoes. My friend then asked me to replace his shoes, since she is technically unemployed and couldn't pay him back. We eventually agreed that I would pay for one shoe. FML
Today, I was at work, and I had to tell my manager I was calling someone to bring me a bra as mine had broken mid-shift. I was the only woman on shift. It took them 30 minutes to show up and I still had to serve front of house while I waited. FML
Today, I received the heels I'll be wearing at my best friend's wedding. The bride ordered them for us to match the dresses. They're six-inch platform heels. I have three broken toes and am still wearing a boot. The wedding is next weekend. FML
Today, as I was getting ready for church, I couldn't decide between my black or white shoes. I put one of each on, then my son started crying. Fast forward, I'm at church, I look down and I'm wearing one white shoe and one black shoe. FML
Today, I wore my new shoes to work, feeling confident. Halfway through the day, I found out that I'd forgotten to remove a giant price sticker on the left sole. My boss pointed it out during a meeting, as I crossed my legs. FML
Today, while trying on clothes in Macy's, someone decided to throw some shoes over the wall and into my changing stall. I now have a black eye. FML
Today, I asked my husband if I should wear my black or red heels with my dress. He looked me up and down from the sofa and said, “We needed to leave 45 minutes ago to have any prayer of getting there on time, I'm now watching TV, so you and your heels please leave me alone now.” Oops. FML
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Top comments
sharksfan48 13
I guess if you say 'pretty black pair' it makes your boyfriend think of a shoe like that. Maybe just say 'black pair' next time.
ShadowBox 8
At least they were YOUR stilettos, right?
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Comments (151)
Beva_fml 15
I feel for your 8-hour shift deal but seriously, "the pretty black pair"? It's a guy you'r talking to, did you expect anything else?
lrak 6
Pretty. Black. Task complete.
freesitter 14
Why would you say "pretty" black shoes? You work with food, save your nice shoes for when your not working.
ballsacks33 17
YDI For not specifying what you wanted.
Probaton 11
Man goes out of his way to help out his girlfriend to the best of his admittedly (and predictably) rudimentary fashion ability and all he gets is this lousy FML.
Neopopulas 9
That the **** did you expect? He can't read your mind..
baristagirl2003 7
The thing happened to me as I was walking to the bus stop to go to jury duty. I asked my brother to bring my chunky heeled loafers and he also brought me stilettos. Ugh! I feel for you girl! Good luck. Make him give you a good foot run when you get home.
simsgirlgem 25
If you were talking about some flats op you should have said so people can't read minds so YDI for not telling him flats
KaiserSD 8
Don't expect a mind-reader then...
miyaviichan 27
'You should have been more specific.' Is that the sound of guys everywhere admitting they have no common sense?
Dilwann 27
Nope. I'm a girl and think they're right. He could've 'forgotten' about what her job involves. She should have been more specific, in the sense, 'pretty black pair, no heels'.
miyaviichan 27
So if it's not lack of common sense, it's absentmindedness.
snazzymcwho 21
#67 I wish I could thumbs you up 300 times. so many people on here blaming the OP when COMMON SENSE would dictate that even a man could figure out stilettos are bad for an 8 hour work shift. ****. I'm so annoyed with this whole comments section.