Today, my potbellied pig ate my neighbor's award-winning flower garden, that she has been growing for almost three years. She'd told me that she was bringing the judges of the competition, in which she was in line to win $300, to her house in two days. I have yet to tell her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mum asked me how the guinea pig was doing. We don't have a guinea pig. Turns out she had volunteered me to look after the next door neighbor's guinea pig when they were away and 'forgot' to tell me. They have been gone two weeks. FML
Today, I agreed to buy my girlfriend a piggle for Christmas. The pig is miniature. The noise it makes is not. Oh, and I just found out it's not living with her, but with me. FML
Today, my dog proudly brought home a rabbit he'd killed. The same rabbit that belongs to my neighbor's daughter. FML
Today, after 2 weeks of hard work in the heat planting a garden, just as I thought the most stressful part was over, my wife's mother comes over and brings a huge dog. She then threw a tennis ball for the dog into my freshly seeded garden multiple times, completely destroying most of it. FML
Today, I learnt that my guinea pig can shoot poop across the room like a tiny brown torpedo. How did I find this out? It landed in my coffee. It wasn't until after I'd finished my coffee that I noticed it. FML
Today, my sister presented me with an "official pet killer" award after yet another goldfish under my care died of unknown causes. FML
Today, my old neighbor pelted me with apples when I walked out the door. I ducked for cover and asked what her problem was. She yelled, "You took fresh peas from my garden!" I looked at her garden, only to see my dad tiptoeing back to our lawn, laughing and holding a bag full of peas. FML
Today, it's been a few weeks since I took up gardening to relax, caring for my plants, and they finally started blooming. Excitedly, I posted a picture online, only to have a friend tell me that my "beautiful flowers" are actually weeds. Apparently, I have a talent for cultivating the unwanted. FML
Today, a bear dragged my neighbor's garbage across the street and stopped right in the middle of my front yard, where it proceeded to scatter the contents and have a feast. When it was finished, it took a massive dump on my lawn. FML
Today, my neighbor came over to borrow my lawnmower. As I have previously loaned it to him and he returned it broken, I refused. He then promptly ate the strawberries off my daughter's small strawberry plant and stormed off. FML
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Top comments
androiddestroya 7
you have a pet pig!? lucky!!!!! :D
moonlight970 0
You need to tell her. The sooner the better.
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Comments (111)
blueeyes67 0
Guess you should give her $300!
ambowew 7
Calmly explain that some wild Diglet passed through her garden and you had no spare pokeballs. I'm sure she'll understand.
catnip1997 0
it's just stupid flowers, who cares
sweet_candy_ 17
Humm I don't know maybe someone who was supposed to get 300$ for them.
catnip1997 0
kid I whipe my ass with $300
catnip1997 0
stay out of this hoe, this doesnt concern you
skyeyez9 25
$300 for 3 years of hard work??
Thejackel79 9
That's $100 per year. Totally worth it.
katalinawine 0
u should take better care of ur pets! I he gets out then keep him on a leash. YDI
jakedrums520 0
Spider pig, spider pig, does whatvever a spider pig does.
Isoldael 27
And it does seem like she entered more competitions since OP refers to her garden as "prize winning"
Isoldael 27
This comment was meant for the one below the spider pig reference, sorry!
Isoldael 27
@everyone who keeps saying 3 years is not worth it for $300 - have you considered that this might not be the only competition she entered in? Maybe this was just one of many. Even if it was just this one, I doubt she did it for the cash but rather for fun / for the honour of winning.
JumbledGirl 2
Well fyl for letting your walking bacon eat flowers. YOUR FAULT.
ryno101 3
Lame. Who gives a ****? Seriously?
rawr666 0
tell her that a gang of possums did it, nobody likes possums
VeganVampyre 27
But... I like possums... :(
ambowew 7
Amen to that. I climbed on the roof of my house a few months prior to fetch a possum that was stuck in a crevice. The ******' little shit bit me so I shook it off my finger and it flew off the roof anyway.