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Thursday 28 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I realised the extent of my wife's cat obsession when I received an $850 bill for the air conditioner she leaves on for our 5 cats while we are at work. FML

#20524027
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19915) - you deserved it (2449)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:12am - animals - by thecatlady (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my roommate told me that she wants to get some of those "My Family" stickers for her car. She's single and has no children. What does she want to get? One for her, and one for her goldfish. Sadly, this is probably one of the most intelligent things she's said all week. FML

#20528651
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19728) - you deserved it (2175)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by dumbass for a flatmate - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I noticed my dog chewing on something while on the couch. It looked like a wash rag of some sort, so I grabbed it from my dog. It wasn't until after I picked it up that I noticed it wasn't a wash rag. It was a small, dead bird. FML

#20527319
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19703) - you deserved it (1665)

On 03/01/2013 at 7:54pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, during a sleepover at my friend's house, I woke up in the middle of the night with a dire need to pee. As I walked in the dark to the bathroom, I saw a silhouette in a doorway and instictively screamed. Turns out it was my friend's sister's One Direction cutout. FML

#20525715
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19652) - you deserved it (3013)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:00pm - misc - by Neversleepingthereagain (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I found that someone had paid off my $16,500 student loan. I was so excited that I called my family and posted on Facebook about how awesome it was. Then I called the loan company and found out that they had just sold my loan to another company; no one had actually paid it off. FML

#20525305
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19648) - you deserved it (8945)

On 02/28/2013 at 2:19am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my car got rear ended by a driver with an "I brake for squirrels" bumper sticker. FML

#20532525
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19553) - you deserved it (1356)

On 03/05/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by MoonBunny - United States (Florida)

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19485) - you deserved it (4791) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I was walking through my town when a man on a bicycle rolled up to me and said, "I don't mean this offensively but you're really well-built." I don't know whether he was commenting on my height or comparing me to a shed, but my mother won't stop laughing. FML

#20531997
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19141) - you deserved it (1889)

On 03/05/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by apparently-a-shed (woman) - United Kingdom (Worcestershire)

Today, after scouring my apartment for quarters to do laundry, I found the correct amount of change. The change got jammed in the washing machine. I now have no more quarters, and my clothes are caked with soap from washing them in the sink. FML

#20524387
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19065) - you deserved it (2232)

On 02/27/2013 at 1:27pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I realized that the only positive accomplishment my boyfriend has made in the last 3 years is that he started wearing deodorant. FML

#20525032
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18806) - you deserved it (5166)

On 02/27/2013 at 10:28pm - love - by butterflyzag20 - United States

Today, I was being interviewed for an amazing job when I was asked what animal I would describe myself as. Trying to be prompt, I picked the first thing that came to me. I responded with, "I'd be a turtle because I'm really slow sometimes." FML

#20531284
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18801) - you deserved it (11674)

On 03/04/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by seriously (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, in my architecture class, my professor's lecture consisted of a list of movies and books which feature characters who are architects. I couldn't leave because I needed the attendance points, and it lasted 45 minutes. I paid out of state tuition for this. FML

#20535215
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18035) - you deserved it (2580)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:18pm - misc - by seriously wtf (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was taking a peaceful stroll in the local park when a curious turkey decided to follow me. Trying to shoo it away, I swung my leg at it, as if to fake kick it. Being the stupid animal it is, it decided to fly into my leg as I swung, causing my foot to connect to its neck. It died. FML

#20529231
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17281) - you deserved it (32656)

On 03/03/2013 at 9:40am - animals - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)



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