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Sunday 24 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I heard from my dad for the first time in over six months. It was through Facebook, in a message blaming my brothers and me for his horrible life, and in which he spelled my name wrong. FML

#20521678
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33293) - you deserved it (2096)

On 02/25/2013 at 2:26pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend made me play Slender. I was so terrified, I stopped playing 10 minutes in. Tonight, I kept hearing noises outside. When I peered out through the window, a bald figure in a suit was staring back at me. I shrieked in absolute terror; he burst out laughing. It was my boyfriend. FML

#20520443
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33215) - you deserved it (4970)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by stillfuckingcrying (woman) - Sweden (Kalmar Lan)

Today, I muted the TV just in time to hear my mom yell at my dad about how their sex life is "non-existent". FML

#20517316
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33180) - you deserved it (4215)

On 02/22/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by PoorMe - United States

Today, my college started an internet "confessions" page. Out of curiosity I checked it out, only to find that it's full of some of the most disturbing stuff I've ever read. My schoolmates are either filthy as fuck or they are all pathological liars. Wonderful. FML

#20524030
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33101) - you deserved it (4650)

On 02/27/2013 at 2:17am - intimacy - by panicelement (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my brother called me, asking if I could help him do his taxes. Since he's a high school and college dropout, I thought all I had to do was a 1040EZ. No, last year he made more than twice what I earn, through self-employment. I have two Master's degrees and work at Burger King. FML

#20527434
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33057) - you deserved it (8092)

On 03/01/2013 at 9:35pm - misc - by tax-man - United States (South Carolina)

Today, as I was about to open a door at school, a student opened it and hit me. As I recovered and was about to open it again, someone else opened the door, hitting me again. Everyone laughed. FML

#20527903
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32867) - you deserved it (3428)

On 03/02/2013 at 9:09am - misc - by Doors Hate Me - United States

Today, for the second time this week, I was asked to stop putting on such an obviously fake "British" accent. I am British and have lived here all my life. FML

#20513499
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32857) - you deserved it (2646)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, I filled out an application for a job at Dairy Queen. I handed my application to the manager along with my résumé, and he said he'd be in contact with me. Not even five minutes after I left, a friend who works there sent me a picture of my crumpled-up application in the trash. FML

#20526818
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32846) - you deserved it (2398)

On 03/01/2013 at 10:52am - work - by anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I emailed 10 parents inviting them to my son's birthday party. All 10 emailed back saying their kids had to get a cavity filled. FML

#20517380
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32809) - you deserved it (3407)

On 02/22/2013 at 9:51am - kids - by Paris101 - United States (Missouri)

Today, a co-worker invited me to go out for lunch with him. I politely declined, saying I had too many errands to do. The truth is that I'm just too broke. I'll be buying myself a burrito using quarters I found on the floor of my car. FML

Today, while at the nail salon, my boyfriend called. Since I was getting my nails done, I had to put him on speaker. The whole salon heard him break up with me. I can still hear their snickering in my head. FML

#20521938
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32565) - you deserved it (6668)

On 02/25/2013 at 6:04pm - love - by HeatherRosure18 - United States (Illinois)

Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML

#20516248
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32473) - you deserved it (2287)

On 02/21/2013 at 1:45pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was so exhausted that I slept through my phone ringing, and later my doorbell ringing. My psycho mom freaked out, and thinking I was in trouble, broke a window to get inside. This all happened before 7am. FML

#20515001
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32442) - you deserved it (2422)

On 02/20/2013 at 3:33pm - misc - by annoyed - United States (Arizona)



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