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Wednesday 13 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the guy I like asked me out for the first time. It's a good thing he did it over Facebook, because I started shaking and almost threw up. I don't know how I'm going to function on our date next week. FML

#20514506
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29037) - you deserved it (7401)

On 02/20/2013 at 2:31am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my sister posted on her Facebook that she hates moving because of all of the packing that she and my family have to do. I didn't even know we're moving. FML

#20510343
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28818) - you deserved it (2205)

On 02/17/2013 at 2:38am - misc - by left-out - United States

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

#20510255
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28455) - you deserved it (5995)

On 02/17/2013 at 12:56am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I got a new roommate after having a horrible relationship with the previous one. She seemed nice at first, until our first night together. She got completely wasted, spilled beer all over my bed and blew chunks into my fish tank. FML

#20513351
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28376) - you deserved it (2594)

On 02/19/2013 at 10:46am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after being together for only 2 weeks, my boyfriend got me a year's gym membership for my birthday in a card that said, "So u can b hott! Luv u!" FML

#20513755
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28325) - you deserved it (5509)

On 02/19/2013 at 5:47pm - love - by katwingz (woman) - United States (Iowa)

Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML

#20503744
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28317) - you deserved it (3883)

On 02/12/2013 at 3:15pm - animals - by Turdfoot (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to give some change to a homeless man. My girlfriend pulled me away and ranted about how homeless people are all basically bastards who deserve their misfortune, and that I shouldn't give "our" money away. FML

#20506599
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28272) - you deserved it (5396)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:06pm - money - by dating a fucking psycho (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I had to use a public bathroom. I have problems going when other people are there, so I waited until everyone left. Two girls noticed I was taking a long time, and started giggling and throwing notes under the door asking if I was alive. This continued for half an hour. FML

#20505035
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28180) - you deserved it (5675)

On 02/13/2013 at 2:33pm - misc - by please leave... - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to yet again explain to the guy I live with that just because you can't see dirt, it doesn't mean it's clean. And so letting his dog lick the plates is NOT the same thing as washing up. He won't listen to me, and he uses my plates. FML

#20507079
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28158) - you deserved it (2958)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:08pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, working as a waitress, I was asked by a customer, yet again, how my baby was doing. I don't have a baby, but I do look very similar to my 25-year-old coworker, who's a new mom. People confuse us all the time. Unfortunately, my crush, who was standing nearby, doesn't know that. FML

#20504501
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28061) - you deserved it (2334)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:12am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had my girlfriend over for dinner with my family. My father had dressed up as a girl for a recent gig of his at a local pub. This got somehow brought up at the table. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of him and my girlfriend discussing bras and lingerie. FML

#20503190
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27729) - you deserved it (3198)

On 02/12/2013 at 12:55am - love - by BadLuckCarson - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend bought herself a brand new iPad and iPod Touch, and returned my aging iPod and Kindle, which she constantly steals for her own use. She considers it my Valentine's Day present. FML

#20506625
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27498) - you deserved it (3267)

On 02/14/2013 at 3:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany



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