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Monday 11 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, just so my family would think someone might actually be interested in me, I bought myself roses and attached a secret admirer card to them. My plan would have worked if I hadn't forgotten to take the receipt off the kitchen counter. FML

#20506184
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7915) - you deserved it (27194)

On 02/14/2013 at 8:18am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Michigan)

Today, one of my employees complained of B.O. wafting into his work space. As a joke, I created an anonymous survey online asking everyone if they had showered in the last 30 days, and sent it out. Half of them put "Yes", the other half put a variation of "I can't afford to shower on my salary." FML

#20506170
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7502) - you deserved it (19247)

On 02/14/2013 at 7:58am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML

#20504494
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6731) - you deserved it (37131)

On 02/13/2013 at 12:07am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kansas)

Today, as my lame excuse to not give a guy I met at a club my phone number, I told him I didn't have a cell phone. Guess what I checked when he asked me what time it was a few minutes later. FML

#20512812
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5907) - you deserved it (35044)

On 02/18/2013 at 10:21pm - misc - by hhhhhhhpeterwut - United States (Maryland)

Today, a cute girl asked if my dog was available for a date on Valentine's Day. Thinking I was in luck, I asked if I should come along. She said no. My dog has better game than I do. FML

#20503854
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (219) - you deserved it (1760)

On 02/12/2013 at 4:50pm - animals - by Doggotmytongue - United States (Illinois)



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