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Friday 1 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after having lost my phone three days ago, I paid a $150 non-refundable fee to have my phone replaced and mailed to me by Tuesday. A half hour later, I found my original phone. FML

#20491153
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22867) - you deserved it (14114)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:14am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I tripped while walking down a large flight of stairs. As I fell forward, I instinctively reached out and grabbed onto one of the guys walking up. I ended up taking him and two other people down with me, earning myself a great many disgusted glares as I dusted myself off. FML

#20489268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22589) - you deserved it (7113)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:53pm - health - by Awkward (man) - United Kingdom (Wolverhampton)

Today, I found out my boyfriend sleeps on a Princess Leia pillow. He's 22. FML

#20494713
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22442) - you deserved it (8180)

On 02/05/2013 at 5:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went on a date with a very cute girl. It went well, until I accidentally called the blueberries in her dessert Oran Berries. I sheepishly explained that they're a berry from the Pokémon universe, at which point she excused herself, never to return. FML

#20490478
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22188) - you deserved it (34455)

On 02/02/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Brock (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I was telling my boyfriend how proud I am of him for finding a really good job. He interrupted me to tell me that my breath smelled like his cat's. FML

#20484067
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21788) - you deserved it (7952)

On 01/28/2013 at 11:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was playing Slender, when I caught a glimpse of the Slenderman. I jumped in my chair, letting rip a huge fart in the process. Nobody heard it, but only because my shrieks of terror drowned out the sound. FML

#20498426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21690) - you deserved it (8426)

On 02/08/2013 at 4:59pm - misc - by theydidsmellitthough (man) - Israel (HaMerkaz)

Today, my boyfriend came over for a family brunch, during which he told my mother, in vivid detail, how he gets the shits whenever he eats kale chips. FML

#20483441
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21258) - you deserved it (2601)

On 01/28/2013 at 6:02pm - health - by shitty situation - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I asked my mother if I could have my boyfriend sleep over for Valentine's day weekend. Her response? "If you're on your period he can. Unless he's into that. Then no." FML

#20496085
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20647) - you deserved it (38096)

On 02/06/2013 at 7:26pm - intimacy - by dab1230 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my dad took me to the empty parking lot of Wal-Mart to try driving for the first time. All was well until he shouted at me for going too slow, which startled me into jerking the wheel and simultaneously stomping on the gas. I don't think Geico covers a Wal-Mart-sized dent in one's car. FML

Today, I had an in-depth conversation at work about how technically Luke Skywalker was never a Jedi Master. Highlight of my working day. FML

#20497564
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20228) - you deserved it (5165)

On 02/07/2013 at 9:56pm - work - by djxerxes9000 - Canada

Today, I bought a fish. I put the tank on top of the fridge so my cat wouldn't get at it. I'd forgotten to buy some things for its tank, so I quickly ran out to get them. When I got home, I saw the tank destroyed on the floor, and my cat devouring my fish. I had the fish for less than an hour. FML

#20497647
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16359) - you deserved it (25815)

On 02/07/2013 at 10:58pm - animals - by fish killer - Canada

Today, on my way to work, I hit a pothole about the size of Alabama, bending my wheel and flattening my tire. After changing it and having to explain myself to my furious boss, I went back on that road in my other car to take a picture of the pothole. While looking for it, I hit it again. FML

#20487332
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14825) - you deserved it (37508)

On 01/31/2013 at 6:34am - money - by Well... fuck me sideways and call me Eustace (man) - United States (California)

Today, I won $50 on the lottery. On the subway home, I checked my pocket to see if the money was still there. A very professional man in a suit yelled, "Hey, that's mine!" I got several dirty glares. I'm such a pathetic wimp that I gave him the money. FML

#20497390
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12687) - you deserved it (49691)

On 02/07/2013 at 7:28pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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