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Saturday 26 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my 5-year-old nephew had the most amazing idea: to play a game with my keys. He took out all ten keys individually and hid them around the house. So far it's been two hours and I haven't found a single one. FML

#20485810
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31206) - you deserved it (3664)

On 01/30/2013 at 2:03am - kids - by idislikeblanks (man) - United States (California)

Today, my school's theatre decided to produce Les Misérables. I got the part of Éponine. My boyfriend, being a talented performer, could have gotten any part he wanted. However, he only wanted to play the soldier responsible for killing Éponine. FML

#20474800
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31144) - you deserved it (5170)

On 01/23/2013 at 1:03pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, months into supporting my mum with her part time cleaning job by cooking dinner for my large family after university, I found out that she doesn't actually have a job, she just leaves the house for a few hours because she doesn't want to cook dinner. FML

#20470602
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31050) - you deserved it (2383)

On 01/21/2013 at 1:03am - work - by CollegeChef (woman) - Australia

Today, I asked my bosses for three weeks off in July to go on a much-needed vacation. Their response was to fire me on the spot. My bosses are my aunt and uncle. FML

#20489213
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30897) - you deserved it (3540)

On 02/01/2013 at 5:13pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Romania (Cluj)

Today, at my retail job, a woman came to my till with her purchases. After I scanned all her items, she handed me two small bags. One was filled with nickels and dimes. The other was filled with cents. Her total was $28.53. The coins amounted to $22.30. FML

#20490092
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30767) - you deserved it (2401)

On 02/02/2013 at 9:53am - work - by fuckedbyretail (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband quit his stable job of 12 years at the bank to pursue a career selling kites. If we don't end up homeless because of this, god knows we will when he has a real mid-life crisis. FML

#20480052
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30717) - you deserved it (3310)

On 01/26/2013 at 5:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I made my first snowman ever, and then cried when my big brother kicked it to pieces. I'm 27. FML

#20475358
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30696) - you deserved it (9466)

On 01/23/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I found out that my roommate has been switching my protein powder with chocolate milk mix and brown sugar. Since I work out frequently, I've been consuming large amounts of this and have gained at least 10 pounds of fat. His reason? I turned his bookbag inside out. Once. FML

#20485077
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30578) - you deserved it (8322)

On 01/29/2013 at 5:56pm - health - by fatty milkshakes - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML

#20485216
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30498) - you deserved it (3135)

On 01/29/2013 at 7:28pm - love - by theawfulpresent (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was driving my 9 month pregnant sister around in our golf cart and it died. I had to push it the rest of the way home. She wouldn't stop faking going into labor. FML

#20477938
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30462) - you deserved it (3967)

On 01/25/2013 at 10:49am - misc - by really?!? - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I led a class of grade-two pupils on an excursion to the zoo. When we went to see the lions I was put in a position where I had to explain to seven and eight year olds why one lion was "bouncing" on top of the other one. FML

#20477486
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30418) - you deserved it (2714)

On 01/25/2013 at 12:25am - kids - by teacher - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my husband yelled at me for not doing any household chores. I can barely move my hand without suffering excruciating pain, due to recent surgery to ease my arthritis, and my other hand is as bad as ever. I can barely work this phone, let alone wash dishes and iron clothes. FML

#20476416
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30340) - you deserved it (5949)

On 01/24/2013 at 12:52pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I was hanging out with my new boyfriend, and he took me back to his house for the first time. Taped to his bedroom door was a sheet of paper emblazoned with the words: "THE RAPE DUNGEON". I feel safer already. FML

#20478132
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30317) - you deserved it (4529)

On 01/25/2013 at 1:51pm - love - by vagina dentata for christmas, pls (woman) - United States



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