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Saturday 5 January 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my husband and I finally agreed on something: marriage counseling. FML

#20455127
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28453) - you deserved it (5843)

On 01/12/2013 at 10:28am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a fight with my boyfriend over a girl he is close to. He later arrived with flowers for what I thought was an apology. He was actually breaking up with me; the flowers were for her, he just didn't want to leave them in the car. FML

#20442364
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28276) - you deserved it (6953)

On 01/04/2013 at 9:08am - love - by damn (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

#20441551
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28076) - you deserved it (5489)

On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27917) - you deserved it (3551)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was walking my dog when he decided that he was too lazy to continue walking. It ended up with me looking like a crazy dog lady carrying my medium-sized dog home. FML

#20448490
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27829) - you deserved it (4849)

On 01/08/2013 at 6:56pm - animals - by life// (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me because I'm too "high maintenance". And that's because I ask him to use condoms when we have sex, and I refuse to invite my friends over for threesomes. I don't know why I'm not actually glad we are broken up. FML

#20445835
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27252) - you deserved it (5317)

On 01/07/2013 at 3:35am - love - by kat124ever (woman) - United States (Armed Forces Europe, Middle East)

Today, at the reading of my mother's last will and testament, I found out that despite having cared for her for the final years of her life, she denied me an inheritance. She basically said I'm an embarrassment, because when she wrote it, I was 31 years old, with no wife or children. FML

#20445078
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27168) - you deserved it (2120)

On 01/06/2013 at 4:35pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, my dad has decided to that as a New Year's resolution, he's going to strive to wear pants less often. It's only been an hour and I can already tell it's going to be a long year. FML

#20435279
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27061) - you deserved it (2061)

On 01/01/2013 at 12:41am - misc - by why? - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my mom asked me why MS Word keeps underlining some words. After I tried to convince her that you're supposed to put a space after commas, she started yelling at me for making her look stupid. I can never win. FML

#20441192
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26242) - you deserved it (2005)

On 01/03/2013 at 5:36pm - misc - by millavitsa - Ukraine

Today, was my birthday. Today was also the day that my mom's cat died four years ago. She was too busy crying and looking at old photos of her beloved cat to even wish me a happy birthday. FML

#20444416
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26238) - you deserved it (2034)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:59am - misc - by Birthday girl (woman) - United States (North Dakota)

Today, I found out that my sleep-walking is so bad that I regularly text my friend while I sleep. I have no idea how many times this has happened. FML

#20455938
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26160) - you deserved it (3288)

On 01/12/2013 at 8:30pm - health - by I'm screwed - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my roommate came back drunk from rushing fraternities. Normally I wouldn't have minded, had he not immediately pissed and thrown up everywhere after entering the room. If only I had moved my guitar and the suitcase full of clothes I had left out after returning from break. FML

Today, I learned that my doctor lost all of my immunization records. I can't start law school without them. FML

#20442687
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25834) - you deserved it (1647)

On 01/04/2013 at 3:51pm - health - by bureaucratic assfuckery (man) - United States (Maryland)



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