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Friday 28 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my skydiving instructor casually remarked that he wouldn't mind "diving into" me sometime. He was strapped to my back the whole way down. FML

#20434488
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36066) - you deserved it (3216)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:44pm - intimacy - by _The__Doctor_ (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I woke up with an engagement ring on my left hand. The same one I refused last month. My boyfriend apparently waited for me to be drunk to propose again last night, and has already posted the pics on Facebook. FML

#20427625
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35927) - you deserved it (13779)

On 12/28/2012 at 10:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I woke up to find our Christmas tree knocked over, unwrapped presents scattered everywhere, and my mom passed out on the sofa with a bottle of booze. Merry Christmas. FML

#20419854
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35735) - you deserved it (2335)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:20pm - misc - by Julie (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I went to bed with a bra on. I woke up with no bra on. My brother had a friend sleep over last night. I wonder where my bra went. FML

#20434205
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35657) - you deserved it (3694)

On 12/31/2012 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML

#20427288
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35512) - you deserved it (5033)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:49am - misc - by Ren - United States (Ohio)

Today, after spending a lot of money on photo shoots to build up my portfolio, I finally got an offer from a modelling agency. I ran outside to tell my parents, only for my brother to hurl an iced snowball straight into my face. I now have a huge gash over my cheek and nose. FML

#20428566
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35457) - you deserved it (3750)

On 12/28/2012 at 8:23pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I had an amazing orgasm. So great that the shortness of breath triggered an extreme asthma attack. FML

#20432803
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35010) - you deserved it (4466)

On 12/30/2012 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I had a proper look at myself in the mirror. I have recently lost 5 lbs. Turns out that it mainly shows on my boob. Not boobs. Boob. Right one only. FML

Today, I went to a urinal next to an elderly gentleman. As I was doing my business, he zips up and begins to leave. On his way out, he leans over my shoulder and whispers in my ear, "That's nice". FML

#20424687
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34246) - you deserved it (2734)

On 12/26/2012 at 11:03pm - misc - by hborkowski (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry and called me selfish, for "using" him as an excuse to get myself nice stuff. FML

#20418722
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33721) - you deserved it (11303)

On 12/24/2012 at 1:06pm - intimacy - by selfishsexysanta (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me with the prettiest, most simple ring I have ever seen. I called my sister to tell her the good news, and her response was, "I know. He had me steal the ring from Claire's." FML

#20432536
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33102) - you deserved it (2352)

On 12/30/2012 at 6:58pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML

#20434472
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33022) - you deserved it (2748)

On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States



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