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Tuesday 11 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my best friend told me about a vicious rumor that's going around, saying I contracted a horrible STD. I asked her if she told everyone it was a lie. She said no, because the rumor is apparently "way too funny to ruin." Maybe it's time for new friends. FML

#20397919
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25826) - you deserved it (2164)

On 12/13/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Katie (woman) - United States

Today, my son sprayed the bottom of my car and windows white with fake snow in Christmas cheer. He did a great job, except he used white spray paint instead of the fake snow. FML

#20400437
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25573) - you deserved it (2156)

On 12/15/2012 at 6:48am - misc - by teejayrn - United States (North Carolina)

Today, as my 12 hour shift was about to finish, a young boy came in wanting to buy a $200 gaming device. His mom said he was purchasing it with his own money, which I found admirable. That is, until he took his piggy bank out of his backpack. FML

#20398760
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25464) - you deserved it (2048)

On 12/14/2012 at 12:10am - kids - by Ethan_18 - United States

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25207) - you deserved it (7250)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, in art class, our instructor called me up to the front to model for a drawing. I agreed to pose because it was nice to be called on, and I needed a self-esteem boost. He then thanked me, saying it's a great exercise for the class to draw such strange proportions. FML

#20202076
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24951) - you deserved it (2121)

On 12/12/2012 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (North Carolina)

Today, some beefed-up guy wearing a wife-beater sat in my restaurant, took out a big sack of coins, and played My Little Pony songs on the jukebox for 4 hours straight. I couldn't summon the courage to tell him to leave. FML

#20401192
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24863) - you deserved it (5531)

On 12/15/2012 at 7:57pm - work - by lingling (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my mother told my therapist that I've been reverting to childlike behavior and she was worried about my maturity. She was worried because I screamed hysterically after dropping a pot of boiling noodles on my lap. FML

#20397574
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24517) - you deserved it (1563)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:31am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while picking up a birthday cake, I was screamed at by an upset woman for getting special attention from the bakers, and that I was nothing more than an attention-hogging slut. The bakers are my co-workers and I was picking my cake up on my day off. FML

#20201761
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23990) - you deserved it (1595)

On 12/12/2012 at 10:05am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML

#20198660
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23955) - you deserved it (1550)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:01am - misc - by Alec (man) - United States

Today, I have a cold. I can't begin to count how many times I've sneezed throughout the day, but I can count how many times I've sneezed so hard that I've peed myself: twice. Once while I was at work helping a customer, the other while sitting on the couch next to my boyfriend. FML

#20397583
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23723) - you deserved it (2263)

On 12/13/2012 at 3:58am - health - by meranda_johnson - United States

Today, my dog did something I had no idea he could do. He participated in an all-male three-way at the dog park. In front of everyone. FML

#20199452
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23467) - you deserved it (2399)

On 12/10/2012 at 7:04pm - animals - by MoreActionThanMe - United States

Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML

#20198778
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23094) - you deserved it (1956)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:13am - misc - by LLCK - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my roommate turned the thermostat down to 50 degrees. Why? Because she read that shivering burns calories. FML

#20200383
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23054) - you deserved it (1808)

On 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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