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Friday 7 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20399) - you deserved it (1582)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20330) - you deserved it (7842)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, in my AP Biology class, a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming, to which my friend gushed, "Yeah! It's been melted for, like, months." FML

#20193921
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20307) - you deserved it (1757)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, I had to get to class at 9:00 to take a test. I woke up at 6:00, and figured I could wait a few minutes before getting ready. The next thing I knew, it was 10:30. FML

#20200420
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20286) - you deserved it (21154)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

#20197946
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20252) - you deserved it (6941)

On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20222) - you deserved it (3664)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out what the two girls I sit near to fight about every day: seating. The loser has to sit next to me. FML

#20189404
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19893) - you deserved it (1770)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, a senile old lady came up to me and offered me chocolate. I noticed that it was ex-lax, so I politely told her no. My 4-year-old daughter pushed me aside and ate the ex-lax, because she thought it was candy. I now have a stinky child on a 3 hour bus ride, with no stops. FML

#20197580
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19809) - you deserved it (9661)

On 12/09/2012 at 11:29am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, after telling my young kids all about Santa, his reindeer and his sleigh, we saw him. Smoking a cigarette in the beat-up car next to ours at a red light. FML

#20192265
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19581) - you deserved it (3736)

On 12/05/2012 at 11:50am - kids - by JessThompson - Canada (Ontario)

Today, while visiting my widowed great aunt, she took out her wedding rings and talked about the love she and my uncle had. Smiling, I told her that one day I hope to have as happy a marriage as theirs. Her response? "Knowing you, I wouldn't count on it." My mother sat there agreeing. FML

#20189035
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19350) - you deserved it (2073)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:17am - misc - by Stupendous_ - Canada (Alberta)

Today, after weeks of begging, I finally got an interview at my dream job. Turns out, they only agreed to interview me because they thought I was someone else. FML

Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML

#20399681
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19098) - you deserved it (2228)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my girlfriend showed me a print of a Banksy that she'd just bought, telling me it was an original. When I tried to argue that it wasn't, she broke up with me for "implying she was a moron." FML

#20190801
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18852) - you deserved it (2487)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:17am - love - by Single (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)



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