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Thursday 6 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the guy I'm dating found out I have severe arachnophobia. He downloaded a picture of a huge, hairy spider and set it as background on my iPhone. I can't even unlock my phone, as every time I try, the spider pops up and I drop the phone. He laughs every time I do it. FML

#20200411
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28649) - you deserved it (5797)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:09pm - love - by skinnybitch (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my doctor finally prescribed me some medication for my arthritis. The cap was insanely well-secured, and my hands were too racked with pain to get it off. FML

#20197805
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28629) - you deserved it (1694)

On 12/09/2012 at 3:03pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my daughter finally gave birth to twin boys. She informed me that she named them Peregrin Took and Meriadoc Brandybuck. My grandsons are named after Hobbits. FML

#20194616
259 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28574) - you deserved it (5401)

On 12/06/2012 at 11:49pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my best friend told me about a vicious rumor that's going around, saying I contracted a horrible STD. I asked her if she told everyone it was a lie. She said no, because the rumor is apparently "way too funny to ruin." Maybe it's time for new friends. FML

#20397919
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28479) - you deserved it (2382)

On 12/13/2012 at 1:00pm - misc - by Katie (woman) - United States

Today, my drunk girlfriend maxed out my credit card, on an "authentic" Jesus Christ autograph on eBay. FML

#20397287
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28111) - you deserved it (4743)

On 12/12/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by maxedoutidiot - United States

Today, I called my dad, because I haven't spoken to him in a while, and I wanted to invite him to my graduation in May. When he picked up, I said, "Hey, how have you been, dad?" He scoffed, "Wrong number" and hung up the phone. FML

#20197219
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28058) - you deserved it (2853)

On 12/09/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28019) - you deserved it (5094) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France

Today, my very cheap boyfriend of four years proposed. I was overwhelmed with emotion, since he bought such a huge, seemingly-diamond ring. I was later overwhelmed with emotion when my finger turned green. FML

#20201870
203 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27873) - you deserved it (3951)

On 12/12/2012 at 12:51pm - love - by dino0123 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

#20199403
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27755) - you deserved it (7656)

On 12/10/2012 at 6:32pm - money - by ihncredible - United States (Michigan)

Today, my family went on a family trip without me. Their reason for not bringing me? My older sister wanted extra legroom during the drive. FML

Today, "The Phantom of the Opera" soundtrack blasted me awake at 4 am. Not knowing how it got on my iPod, I checked and found I had bought the whole $17.00 album in my sleep. This is the second time this month; the first time I downloaded the soundtrack from "The Wizard of Oz". FML

#20198547
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27467) - you deserved it (6174)

On 12/10/2012 at 12:10am - money - by hailey - United States (Maryland)

Today, I found out that my wife, who is supposed to be a recovering alcoholic, drank an entire bottle of wine and then tried to hide it at the bottom of a garbage bin. To make matters worse, when I confronted her about it, she tried to convince me that our 5-year-old daughter had drunk it. FML

#20194263
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27400) - you deserved it (1910)

On 12/06/2012 at 8:07pm - misc - by Matt8 (man) - United States

Today, my son got suspended from school. He's in kindergarten. FML

#20201910
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27219) - you deserved it (6727)

On 12/12/2012 at 1:32pm - kids - by Renzy (woman) -



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