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Tuesday 4 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after a romantic dinner, movie, and stroll in the park, we had our first kiss. It would have been perfect, had a passerby not thrown rubbish at us for "unnecessary public display of affection." FML

#20194899
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20904) - you deserved it (2812)

On 12/07/2012 at 7:39am - love - by First Kiss - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20730) - you deserved it (1440)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML

#20194217
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20392) - you deserved it (1526)

On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20371) - you deserved it (3585)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20307) - you deserved it (2034)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my roommate turned the thermostat down to 50 degrees. Why? Because she read that shivering burns calories. FML

#20200383
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20293) - you deserved it (1577)

On 12/11/2012 at 12:17pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20239) - you deserved it (1737)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I was out clubbing. My girlfriend went to get us drinks, so I danced alone while I waited. Some girl with hideous meth mouth, who was clearly tripping balls, started harassing and groping me, and got all three of us kicked out when my girlfriend returned and beat the hell out of her. FML

#20195284
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20174) - you deserved it (2418)

On 12/07/2012 at 4:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, as my friend was rudely rummaging through my phone, she saw a picture of the pottery I've painted her for Christmas. Not only did she see it, but she also declared it ugly. That's probably the present I'm the most proud of this Christmas. FML

#20193344
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19815) - you deserved it (1857)

On 12/06/2012 at 1:15am - misc - by a - United States (Tennessee)

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19683) - you deserved it (2198)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19646) - you deserved it (3715)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

#20191703
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19623) - you deserved it (3149)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19557) - you deserved it (3561)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)



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