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Tuesday 4 December 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I ran into my high school crush at Target. When I asked her if she remembered me, she patted me on the head, said, "Unfortunately," and walked away. FML

#20191408
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21740) - you deserved it (2310)

On 12/04/2012 at 8:06pm - misc - by Likian5 (man) - United States

Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML

#20194217
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21735) - you deserved it (1640)

On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML

#20192329
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21641) - you deserved it (3718)

On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went on a blind date. My date turned out to be very hot, and I had high hopes. That is, until she ran her hand through her hair as she approached, sending some kind of horrifying, miasmic mist of dandruff and dead skin floating through the air behind her. FML

#20197946
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21536) - you deserved it (7162)

On 12/09/2012 at 4:52pm - love - by HOLY SHIT, A WALKING SNOWGLOBE (man) - United Kingdom (Barking and Dagenham)

Today, it's my sixth day taking care of my family's seven animals while my parents are in Singapore. So far, I've emergency-called the vet twice, taken a dog to the vet once, and cleaned up liquid dog shit five times. FML

#20197436
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21482) - you deserved it (2381)

On 12/09/2012 at 8:18am - animals - by KennyDidIt - United States (Alabama)

Today, I started a new job. I'm now trapped in a small office with a woman who says, "Oh my gravy!" constantly. In response to everything. FML

#20201125
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21373) - you deserved it (1822)

On 12/11/2012 at 9:53pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, in my AP Biology class, a student informed us she'd read that Antarctica had completely melted due to global warming, to which my friend gushed, "Yeah! It's been melted for, like, months." FML

#20193921
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21366) - you deserved it (1846)

On 12/06/2012 at 3:47pm - misc - by bieberslayer (woman) - United States

Today, I got into a fight with my girlfriend. After yelling and arguing my point, my cat got up and jumped up next to her on the bed. He sat down, and they both glared at me until I left. FML

#20189474
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21362) - you deserved it (3825)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:02pm - animals - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21169) - you deserved it (2183)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

Today, while I was at a urinal, a man came up to use the one next to me. He then said, "I guess this is where all the dicks hang out." He then stared at me until I left. FML

#20190054
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21093) - you deserved it (1639)

On 12/03/2012 at 9:14pm - misc - by reedcarter -

Today, I had to create a perfect society in English class; the best society has their grade go up a full letter. After tons of preparation and thinking, I lost to an island made only of cheese. FML

#20200774
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21018) - you deserved it (1934)

On 12/11/2012 at 6:03pm - misc - by JPPUDLY (man) - United States (California)

Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML

#20189050
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20979) - you deserved it (1467)

On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)

Today, it's my 21st birthday and my dad has decided to take away my ID in fear that if I have even one drink to celebrate I'll become a raging alcoholic. FML

#20189765
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (2226)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:01pm - misc - by VedaLynn - United States



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