Friday 30 November 2012 
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Today, I was working the dart game at my local amusement park when a couple paid to play. They were highly intoxicated, and they thought the object of the game was to hit me with the darts. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16861) - you deserved it (1296)
On 11/28/2012 at 10:14am - work - by hawksbc (woman) - United States (Iowa)
Today, my girlfriend decided it would be cute to leave a love letter in my car while I was at work. She left my lights on. I got a dead battery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16684) - you deserved it (1768)
On 11/26/2012 at 1:59pm - love - by Blake Lawrence - United States (Utah)
Today, my step-mom restarted the computer because she thought she'd downloaded a virus that stopped her from being able to click on anything, erasing my 7-page paper in the process. It turns out it was just the batteries dying in our wireless mouse. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16680) - you deserved it (8754)
On 11/27/2012 at 12:06am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I walked out of my apartment to see that someone had climbed onto the hood of my car and taken a shit on my windshield. I only moved in a couple of weeks ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16564) - you deserved it (1147)
On 12/03/2012 at 2:36am - misc - by poopsthegame - United States (Hawaii)
Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16445) - you deserved it (1426)
On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my mom hung her new "Christmas Clock" on the wall. It plays a different Christmas carol every hour, on the hour. It's only December 2nd and I'm already starting to understand why suicide rates sky rocket this time of year. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16264) - you deserved it (1476)
On 12/02/2012 at 11:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, one of my work colleagues was staring at my severe sunburn. She wanted to know if she could "peel" me, when my sunburn becomes "ripe", because she loves the sound. She won't take no for an answer, and I work with her everyday this week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16257) - you deserved it (1230)
On 12/06/2012 at 7:19pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16190) - you deserved it (1219)
On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)
Today, I was enjoying a nice bath, when one of my cats jumped up on the rim and started purring. I thought it was sweet, until my other cat ran in and body-slammed the first into the tub with me. Being a conscientious cat owner, I hadn't de-clawed them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16164) - you deserved it (4988)
On 11/27/2012 at 2:52pm - animals - by Neutered (man) - United States (Alaska)
Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (16121) - you deserved it (2695)
On 12/05/2012 at 12:55pm - health - by Emily - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my girlfriend got into the Christmas cheer while giving me a hand job, smashing my nuts with her palm in time to her humming of Jingle Bells. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16091) - you deserved it (2442)
On 12/02/2012 at 6:39pm - intimacy - by fineididntwantkidsanyway (man) - Australia (South Australia)
Today, after coming home from surgery, I discovered that the heating in my entire building had failed. I called my mom asking if I could come and stay with her for a few days. She told me to "think warm thoughts." FML
I agree, your life sucks (15914) - you deserved it (869)
On 12/05/2012 at 6:27pm - money - by lonelyandcold (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)
Today, I was yelled at by a customer, who was upset over having waited twenty minutes for a waiter to come take her order. Maybe it would be understandable, if she was sitting in an actual restaurant, and not a serve-yourself coffee house. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15861) - you deserved it (798)
On 12/06/2012 at 6:50pm - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)
Friday 24 May 2013
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