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Thursday 29 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I had a presentation in French class. I was so nervous, the first thing I said when I got up there was, "Hola." FML

#20193303
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28016) - you deserved it (5137)

On 12/06/2012 at 12:35am - work - by SpanishInFrenchClass (woman) - United States

Today, I had some soup that my dad made. I took one sip and found he had put tons of hot sauce in it. I rushed to drink from a soda can sitting on the counter, only to find that my mom had used it as an ash tray the night before. I can still taste the hot sauce, and the ash. FML

#20179829
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27738) - you deserved it (3161)

On 11/26/2012 at 3:13pm - misc - by Autocorrected - Philippines (Manila)

Today, I was bartending. A guest was getting belligerent so I had to cut him off. He called me a bitch and threw the rest of his drink in my face before storming off. The belligerent asscandle was my boyfriend. FML

#20193528
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27693) - you deserved it (4502)

On 12/06/2012 at 6:50am - love - by FMyEx - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me by throwing my stuff out of his place, and accusing me of cheating while yelling, "Cheater, cheater! Pumpkin eater!" When I tried explaining that I have no clue what he's talking about, he started exclaiming, "Liar, liar! Pants on fire!" FML

#20180296
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27665) - you deserved it (3270)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:41pm - love - by imnotacheateryouimmaturefuck (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

#20186150
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27533) - you deserved it (2112)

On 12/01/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's; his father was with him the whole entire time. He is 27. FML

#20180462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27381) - you deserved it (2217)

On 11/26/2012 at 10:13pm - love - by N - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, while working at my local supermarket, I found a boy lost and wandering about, so I took him to the front desk. My reward from his mother was a slap around the face and harsh words for supposedly having kidnapped him. FML

#20183959
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27290) - you deserved it (1758)

On 11/29/2012 at 1:08pm - work - by bitch i'm a gerontophile (man) - Taiwan

Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. After dessert, he went to the bathroom so I quickly called the waiter over and paid the bill, thinking it was a nice gesture. When he returned, he broke up with me for "emasculating" him. FML

#20180957
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27287) - you deserved it (4367)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:36am - love - by Clementine (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my science class found out that I have OCD and that one of my rituals is to cough when others cough. This is going to be a long year. FML

#20191703
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26995) - you deserved it (4083)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:09pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I heard a teenage boy ask his friend, "So, is it, like, November in Australia too?" This is the future of America. FML

#20179140
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26982) - you deserved it (2673)

On 11/26/2012 at 12:27am - kids - by toritoratora - United States (California)

Today, my daughter called me to pick her up at the mall. She said I had to meet her inside a specific store, so I figured she wanted me to pay for something. Turns out I was right, she was being arrested for shoplifting. FML

#20193017
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26793) - you deserved it (2634)

On 12/05/2012 at 9:32pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, as I was about to walk across the street, a girl in front of me who clearly wasn't paying attention to the traffic, almost got run over. I grabbed her arm and jumped back. She was fine. I fell and fractured my arm and wrist. FML

#20182568
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26788) - you deserved it (2265)

On 11/28/2012 at 12:43pm - health - by williebees - United States (Texas)

Today, I dropped my handbag into a water-filled gutter. As I was hurriedly fishing out the contents of my bag, I looked up. There was my ex, with the girl he left me for walking past, timed exactly to coincide with me manically scooping up one of many rapidly absorbing tampons. FML

#20194448
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26786) - you deserved it (2097)

On 12/06/2012 at 10:11pm - love - by shamefaced (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)



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