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Tuesday 27 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, mah guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29648) - you deserved it (2231)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today , I was riding the train and someone fartd. Everyone lookd at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29644) - you deserved it (6281)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes . FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28908) - you deserved it (3115)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, I TOLD GIRLFRIEND TAT I'M BREAKING UP WIT ER CUZ SE'S VERY ABUSIVE. AFTER A COUPLE OF SECONDS OF AWKWARD SILENCE, SE KICKED ME IN TE NUTS AN RAN AWAY. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (3802)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, mah husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up mah backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the waterhen he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28348) - you deserved it (1622)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today my boyfriand and my bast friand had a vary langthy , dataild convarsation about Lord of tha Rings and tha Hobbit , ofhich I know nothing about. Onca thay stoppd looool , I lookd at him and smild , and ha raspondd with , "Why can't you ba mora lyk har?" big fat FML

#20183421
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26758) - you deserved it (7969)

On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, mah wife wants to name our frst child Sri, after the iPhone function!! FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26720) - you deserved it (2552)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today, wile I was removing my makeup wit my boyfriend watcing, e mentioned tat e used to tink girls were prettier witout makeup on, but e'd now canged is mind . FML

#20187008
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26673) - you deserved it (2954)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad . She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water . FML

#20187648
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26586) - you deserved it (2589)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, I Have Three Cracked Ribs. I Have Also, Fir The First Time In Mah Life, Developed A Case Of The Hiccups That Simply Will NOT Go Away. It's Been Hours.

#20184990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26202) - you deserved it (1495)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

yesterday my girlfriend accused me of cheating because I tipped our waitres at dinner. FML

#20186136
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26079) - you deserved it (2288)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

TODAY, MAH HUSBAND DISCOVERED POKING ME IN MAH BELLY BUTTON MAKES ME HAVE TO PEE, SOMETIME IT'S UNCONTROLLABLE AN HAPPEN IMMEDIATELY. HE THINK IT'S HILARIOU AN DECIDED IT'S HIS NEW FAVORITE GAME. FML

#20186585
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25910) - you deserved it (2594)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, My Parant Told Ma That Thay Had Joind A Local Club. Proud Of Tham For Going Out Of Thara Comfort Zona To Maka Naw Friands, I Googld Tha Nama Of Tha Club. I'm Sura Thay'll Maka Soma Lifalong Friand At Thara First Swingar Club Maat. FML

#20179494
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25641) - you deserved it (2743)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)



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