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Tuesday 27 November 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my guy friend kept complaining that no one had asked him to the dance, so he probably wasn't going to go. I suggested that we go together. He laughed until his face was bright red and said, "I don't think I'll ever get that desperate." FML

#20187578
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29614) - you deserved it (2226)

On 12/02/2012 at 3:03am - love - by Anna - United States (Washington)

Today, I was riding the train and someone farted. Everyone looked at me. People always blame farts on the fat guy. FML

#20190789
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29604) - you deserved it (6273)

On 12/04/2012 at 11:04am - misc - by Banana (man) - Puerto Rico

Today, I told my girlfriend that I'm breaking up with her because she's very abusive. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she kicked me in the nuts and ran away. FML

#20189170
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28604) - you deserved it (3796)

On 12/03/2012 at 6:53am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my husband ran a nice warm bubble bath with extra bubbles. I undressed and slid down into the tub only to have the most ungodly pain go up my backside. Turns out he knocked his razor into the water when he added the bubbles. I now have two butt cracks. FML

#20181043
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28311) - you deserved it (1620)

On 11/27/2012 at 9:32am - misc - by Cracky - United States (Maryland)

Today, I realized that the comforting, unique scent of my mother in my childhood was actually the smell of the marijuana she smokes. FML

#20184714
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27007) - you deserved it (2935)

On 11/29/2012 at 10:35pm - misc - by childhoodupinsmoke (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today my boyfriend and my best friend had a very lengthy, detailed conversation about Lord of the Rings and the Hobbit, of which I know nothing about. Once they stopped, I looked at him and smiled, and he responded with, "Why can't you be more like her?" FML

#20183421
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26734) - you deserved it (7966)

On 11/28/2012 at 11:33pm - love - by JStein (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, while I was removing my makeup with my boyfriend watching, he mentioned that he used to think girls were prettier without makeup on, but he'd now changed his mind. FML

#20187008
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26628) - you deserved it (2953)

On 12/01/2012 at 6:54pm - love - by allbrokeup (woman) - Norway (Rogaland)

Today, my friend spilt orange juice all over my iPad. She then went ahead to clean it off by rinsing it with water. FML

#20187648
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26549) - you deserved it (2588)

On 12/02/2012 at 5:16am - misc - by Ashley - United States (California)

Today, my wife wants to name our first child Siri, after the iPhone function. FML

#20182157
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26394) - you deserved it (2529)

On 11/28/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by boo8713 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I have three cracked ribs. I have also, for the first time in my life, developed a case of the hiccups that simply will NOT go away. It's been hours. FML

#20184990
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26163) - you deserved it (1495)

On 11/30/2012 at 2:30am - health - by Atletic - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of cheating, because I tipped our waitress at dinner. FML

#20186136
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26053) - you deserved it (2287)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:59am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband discovered poking me in my belly button makes me have to pee, sometimes it's uncontrollable and happens immediately. He thinks it's hilarious and decided it's his new favorite game. FML

#20186585
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25876) - you deserved it (2593)

On 12/01/2012 at 12:01pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, my parents told me that they had joined a local club. Proud of them for going out of their comfort zone to make new friends, I googled the name of the club. I'm sure they'll make some lifelong friends at their first swingers club meet. FML

#20179494
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25610) - you deserved it (2743)

On 11/26/2012 at 8:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

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